The Joint of No Return: (Far Out Chronicles: Book One)

HIFI Press

Narrated by Michael Foster

3 hr 26 min

"Star Trek meets Cheech & Chong!" #1 INTERGALACTIC BESTSELLING author Tom Sadira invites you to take a trip to the farthest reaches of outer space in this hilarious sci-fi adventure saga.

Charlie Hong is on the run from both sides of the law.

He’s spent the last year in hiding, cultivating one last hair-brained scheme to escape his troubles: a clandestine marijuana operation. Just as he’s about to cash in, his cash crop is stolen by a bright light appearing in the night sky. After catching a ride with one of his plants, he finds himself thrown into a world far stranger than anything he could have possibly imagined.

Does the stoned stowaway have what it takes to free the Starseed, a massive living spaceship overflowing with bizarre life forms, from the clutches of a mysterious force field trapping it in Earth’s orbit?

More importantly, before he decides anything, does he have time to light one up?

INTERPLANETARY PRAISE FOR FAR OUT CHRONICLES:

“★★★★★ Tom Sadira’s Far Out Chronicles has restored the galaxy’s faith in Earth’s ability to produce fresh and riveting science fiction. Without it, the Council would have demolished that dirty, backwater planet long ago.” — Emperor Izzug Brutag of the 713th Galactic Council

“★★★★★ The fast-paced, imaginative storytelling really helps get things moving during the weeks-long excretion rituals of Alpha Orionis, if ya know what I mean.” — Blek Ylp, custodial engineer in the Betelgeuse system

“★★★★★ The rip-roaring adventure series Far Out Chronicles kept the G’wark species distracted long enough for us to complete our weapon and wipe out their homeworld. Thanks Earthling!” — Commander Zrauvvurbu of the Essari Rebellion

“★★★★★ ...so witty and delightful it made me wish that my processor core was capable of laughter. I have scheduled it to be stored in my memory banks for more nanoseconds than is logical...” — Qu’tron Krix, Prime Instance of the Cyborg Continuum

“★★★★★ The hivemind of Pollux Major loved the Far Out Chronicles so much that we couldn’t wait for more books in the series. We’ve used our forbidden time-jump technology to travel forward in time to get our hands on the complete works of Tom Sadira. All we can say is: it was totally worth the risk of temporal paradox!” — The Hivemind of Pollux Major

Readers have compared the The Far Out Chronicles series to Douglas Adams ' Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Barry J. Hutchison's Space Team series, Robert Heinlein, Ernest Cline, John Scalzi, and James S.A.Corey.

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Additional Information

Publisher
HIFI Press
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Published on
Sep 12, 2018
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Duration
3h 26m 32s
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ISBN
9781948588027
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Language
English
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Genres
Fiction / Science Fiction / Action & Adventure
Fiction / Science Fiction / Humorous
Fiction / Science Fiction / Space Opera
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Eligible for Family Library

Listening information

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"Star Trek meets Cheech & Chong!" – #1 INTERGALACTIC BESTSELLING author Tom Sadira invites you on another trip to the farthest reaches of outer space in this hilarious sci-fi adventure saga.

In the past 24 hours, stoner Charlie Hong has been promoted from fugitive pot-grower to captain of the Starseed. Whether he likes it or not, the massive, living, interstellar spaceship–and its five hundred billion inhabitants–are now his responsibility.

As his suspicious crew gives him a tour of the ship, a quiet invasion unfolds. When the rest of his team is disabled by the buggy invaders, Charlie is left with a decision: to try to save the ship armed with only his stoned wit and a plump red hen, or to hightail it back to his old life on Earth.

INTERPLANETARY PRAISE FOR FAR OUT CHRONICLES:

“★★★★★ Tom Sadira’s Far Out Chronicles has restored the galaxy’s faith in Earth’s ability to produce fresh and riveting science fiction. Without it, the Council would have demolished that dirty, backwater planet long ago.” — Emperor Izzug Brutag of the 713th Galactic Council

“★★★★★ The fast-paced, imaginative storytelling really helps get things moving during the weeks-long excretion rituals of Alpha Orionis, if ya know what I mean.” — Blek Ylp, custodial engineer in the Betelgeuse system

“★★★★★ The rip-roaring adventure series Far Out Chronicles kept the G’wark species distracted long enough for us to complete our weapon and wipe out their homeworld. Thanks Earthling!” — Commander Zrauvvurbu of the Essari Rebellion

“★★★★★ ...so witty and delightful it made me wish that my processor core was capable of laughter. I have scheduled it to be stored in my memory banks for more nanoseconds than is logical...” — Qu’tron Krix, Prime Instance of the Cyborg Continuum

“★★★★★ The hivemind of Pollux Major loved the Far Out Chronicles so much that we couldn’t wait for more books in the series. We’ve used our forbidden time-jump technology to travel forward in time to get our hands on the complete works of Tom Sadira. All we can say is: it was totally worth the risk of temporal paradox!” — The Hivemind of Pollux Major

Readers have compared the The Far Out Chronicles series to Douglas Adams ' Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Barry J. Hutchison's Space Team series, Robert Heinlein, Ernest Cline, John Scalzi, and James S.A.Corey.

"Star Trek meets Cheech & Chong!" – #1 INTERGALACTIC BESTSELLING author Tom Sadira invites you on another trip to the farthest reaches of outer space in this hilarious sci-fi adventure saga.

In the past 24 hours, stoner Charlie Hong has been promoted from fugitive pot-grower to captain of the Starseed. Whether he likes it or not, the massive, living, interstellar spaceship–and its five hundred billion inhabitants–are now his responsibility.

As his suspicious crew gives him a tour of the ship, a quiet invasion unfolds. When the rest of his team is disabled by the buggy invaders, Charlie is left with a decision: to try to save the ship armed with only his stoned wit and a plump red hen, or to hightail it back to his old life on Earth.

INTERPLANETARY PRAISE FOR FAR OUT CHRONICLES:

“★★★★★ Tom Sadira’s Far Out Chronicles has restored the galaxy’s faith in Earth’s ability to produce fresh and riveting science fiction. Without it, the Council would have demolished that dirty, backwater planet long ago.” — Emperor Izzug Brutag of the 713th Galactic Council

“★★★★★ The fast-paced, imaginative storytelling really helps get things moving during the weeks-long excretion rituals of Alpha Orionis, if ya know what I mean.” — Blek Ylp, custodial engineer in the Betelgeuse system

“★★★★★ The rip-roaring adventure series Far Out Chronicles kept the G’wark species distracted long enough for us to complete our weapon and wipe out their homeworld. Thanks Earthling!” — Commander Zrauvvurbu of the Essari Rebellion

“★★★★★ ...so witty and delightful it made me wish that my processor core was capable of laughter. I have scheduled it to be stored in my memory banks for more nanoseconds than is logical...” — Qu’tron Krix, Prime Instance of the Cyborg Continuum

“★★★★★ The hivemind of Pollux Major loved the Far Out Chronicles so much that we couldn’t wait for more books in the series. We’ve used our forbidden time-jump technology to travel forward in time to get our hands on the complete works of Tom Sadira. All we can say is: it was totally worth the risk of temporal paradox!” — The Hivemind of Pollux Major

Readers have compared the The Far Out Chronicles series to Douglas Adams ' Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Barry J. Hutchison's Space Team series, Robert Heinlein, Ernest Cline, John Scalzi, and James S.A.Corey.

The definitive novel of today’s Silicon Valley, After On flash-captures our cultural and technological moment with up-to-the-instant savvy. Matters of privacy and government intrusion, post-Tinder romance, nihilistic terrorism, artificial consciousness, synthetic biology, and much more are tackled with authority and brash playfulness by New York Times bestselling author Rob Reid.

Meet Phluttr—a diabolically addictive new social network and a villainess, heroine, enemy, and/or bestie to millions. Phluttr has ingested every fact and message ever sent to, from, and about her innumerable users. Her capabilities astound her makers—and they don’t even know the tenth of it.
     
But what’s the purpose of this stunning creation? Is it a front for something even darker and more powerful than the NSA? A bid to create a trillion-dollar market by becoming “The UberX of Sex”? Or a reckless experiment that could spawn the digital equivalent of a middle-school mean girl with enough charisma, dirt, and cunning to bend the entire planet to her will?

Phluttr has it in her to become the greatest gossip, flirt, or matchmaker in history. Or she could cure cancer, bring back Seinfeld, then start a nuclear war. Whatever she does, it’s not up to us. But a motley band of Silicon Valley entrepreneurs, venture capitalists, and engineers might be able to influence her.

After On achieves the literary singularity—fusing speculative satire and astonishing reality into a sharp-witted, ferociously believable, IMAX-wide view of our digital age.

Narrated by Sean Kenin and January LaVoy, with:
Felicia Day: NETGRRRL.COM
Patrick Rothfuss: Special Field Operative Brock Hogan
John Hodgman: Charles Henry Higgensworth III
Tom Merritt: voice of The New York Times
Jesse Cox:  Whistle Blowings Blog
Leo Laporte: voice of the San Francisco Chronicle

Advance praise for After On

“Enter a near-future Silicon Valley that is hilariously, creepily, mind-bogglingly fantastic, yet at the same time all too believable. It might turn out this way. No, really, it might! Along with After On’s diabolically ingenious plot, there are crazy-plausible web startups, delicious parodies of social media, and a surprisingly convincing theory of human consciousness.”—Chris Anderson, head of TED

“Reading After On is like attending a master class in nearly every major issue haunting not only the tech industry but society itself. Only the professor is also a stand-up comic with a perfect ear for the foibles of Silicon Valley’s most sacred cows. Part AI thriller, part arch social commentary, and part rollicking farce, After On will leave you smarter about just about everything the human species needs to work on if we’re going to outlive our own creations—and our obsessions with them.”—John Battelle, co-founder, NewCo, Federated Media, and Wired

“The future is already here—it’s just for those who read Reid!”—Steve Jurvetson, venture capitalist, Draper Fisher Jurvetson

“Rob Reid doesn’t write science fiction; he writes future history. After On is the best account I’ve read of how superintelligence will arrive and what it will mean for all of us. Hilarious, frightening, believable, and marvelously constructed—After On has it all.”—Hugh Howey, New York Times bestselling author of Wool

"Star Trek meets Cheech & Chong!" – #1 INTERGALACTIC BESTSELLING author Tom Sadira invites you on another trip to the farthest reaches of outer space in this hilarious sci-fi adventure saga.

In the past 24 hours, stoner Charlie Hong has been promoted from fugitive pot-grower to captain of the Starseed. Whether he likes it or not, the massive, living, interstellar spaceship–and its five hundred billion inhabitants–are now his responsibility.

As his suspicious crew gives him a tour of the ship, a quiet invasion unfolds. When the rest of his team is disabled by the buggy invaders, Charlie is left with a decision: to try to save the ship armed with only his stoned wit and a plump red hen, or to hightail it back to his old life on Earth.

INTERPLANETARY PRAISE FOR FAR OUT CHRONICLES:

“★★★★★ Tom Sadira’s Far Out Chronicles has restored the galaxy’s faith in Earth’s ability to produce fresh and riveting science fiction. Without it, the Council would have demolished that dirty, backwater planet long ago.” — Emperor Izzug Brutag of the 713th Galactic Council

“★★★★★ The fast-paced, imaginative storytelling really helps get things moving during the weeks-long excretion rituals of Alpha Orionis, if ya know what I mean.” — Blek Ylp, custodial engineer in the Betelgeuse system

“★★★★★ The rip-roaring adventure series Far Out Chronicles kept the G’wark species distracted long enough for us to complete our weapon and wipe out their homeworld. Thanks Earthling!” — Commander Zrauvvurbu of the Essari Rebellion

“★★★★★ ...so witty and delightful it made me wish that my processor core was capable of laughter. I have scheduled it to be stored in my memory banks for more nanoseconds than is logical...” — Qu’tron Krix, Prime Instance of the Cyborg Continuum

“★★★★★ The hivemind of Pollux Major loved the Far Out Chronicles so much that we couldn’t wait for more books in the series. We’ve used our forbidden time-jump technology to travel forward in time to get our hands on the complete works of Tom Sadira. All we can say is: it was totally worth the risk of temporal paradox!” — The Hivemind of Pollux Major

Readers have compared the The Far Out Chronicles series to Douglas Adams ' Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Barry J. Hutchison's Space Team series, Robert Heinlein, Ernest Cline, John Scalzi, and James S.A.Corey.

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