Nominated for the Edgar Award for Best First Novel, Gun Monkeys is a fast, furious collage of wit and wise guys, violence and thrills—and a full-throttle run through the dark side of the Sunshine State.
From the Paperback edition.
Mike’s nephew Andrew needs to disappear, and he needs to do it yesterday. Hanging with the wrong kind of friends, he’s seen something he shouldn’t have, and now he’s running for his life with an assassin on his trail. The consummate professional hit woman, Nikki Enders is the most lethal of a deadly sisterhood. And Andrew Foley is next on her extermination list. Unless Uncle Mike can stop her. As kill teams descend on Foley’s farm, one pissed-off ex—tough guy is about to take a final, all-or-nothing stand with shotguns blazing....
From the Paperback edition.
Celebrated novelist Victor Gischler joins Joss Whedon's team.
Payne Kirby is a good old boy from Louisiana. He’s lazy. He drinks too much. When his brother Ray offers Payne an opportunity to fund his slack-ass lifestyle, Payne jumps at the chance.
Ray is a bail bondsman and calls in Payne to track down a skipped getaway thief. He sends Payne to Baton Rouge where the local thugs hook him up with a “tour guide” to show him around town.
Enter Big Stupid. In Payne’s words, Big Stupid looks like “the black guy from The Green Mile ate Andre the giant.” At first Payne is impatient with his new hulking, slow-witted sidekick, but as they continue to track the money through the steaming summer cities of Baton Rouge and New Orleans, they become a team.
Meanwhile, a Cat-4 hurricane brews in the Gulf and is headed straight for New Orleans...
Written by brilliant master of hard-boiled and famous comic book screenwriter Victor Gischler, BIG STUPID is a steamy gumbo of sex and violence.
The high spot of Teddy Folger's life was the day in 1954 that he got an autographed baseball card from Joe DiMaggio himself. It's been downhill ever since. Which is why he just unloaded his freeloading wife and torched his own comic-book store–in one of the stupidest insurance scams in history. Enter Conner Samson. The down-on-his-luck repo man has just been hired to repossess Teddy's boat. Little does he know there's a baseball card on board that some men are willing to kill for. Thus begins a rip-roaring cross-country odyssey–and with bodies piling up, the squeeze is on for the penultimate piece of Americana. And Conner will be lucky if he ends up back where he started: broke and (still) breathing.
From the Hardcover edition.
An unlucky grad student just got himself killed in a robbery gone bad. And as lowly drug lieutenant Harold Jenks races with the killer out of the alley, a light goes off in his head: He’ll steal the dead kid’s identity. Now Jenks, who once lorded it over seven square blocks in East St. Louis, is headed due west. With a .32 in his pocket, a 9mm Glock taped across his back, and a rap sheet nearly as long as Finnegans Wake, he’s cruising the halls of academia as Eastern Oklahoma U’s newest grad student, looking for action and hoping he can stay one couplet ahead of his violent past.
While this new bad boy on campus makes mincemeat of his metaphors, across campus visiting professor Jay Morgan has a more pressing problem: What to do about the dead coed in his bed. The professor’s no killer, but try telling that to private eye Deke Stubbs. With the professor on the lam and Stubbs hot on his trail, more trouble blows into town. Now, as St. Louis drug boss Red Zach and his minions converge on Fumbee, Oklahoma, looking for a consignment of missing cocaine, the bullets start flying faster than the zingers at a faculty hate fest. For Morgan and Jenks, now desperate fugitives from poetic justice, survival means learning new skills—and learning fast. Because if they find out they’re bottom-of-the-class, that means they’re already dead.
Featuring the sleaziest, sorriest, and most captivating group of criminal lowlifes, sexed-up academics, poets, and rappers ever to collide in one crime novel, The Pistol Poets speeds deliriously to its electrifying payoff.
From the Hardcover edition.
Accompanied by his cowboy sidekick Buffalo Bill, the gorgeous stripper Sheila, and the mountain man Ted, Mortimer journeys to the lost city of Atlanta -- and a showdown that might determine the fate of humanity.
David Sparrow is an awesome stay-at-home dad. He gets his kids ready for school while his wife, Amy, commutes to New York City, where she is an Assistant District Attorney. She just inherited a major case: prosecuting crime lord Dante Payne. Meanwhile, David is content chatting with the moms at school drop-off, and doing housework.
One night, David is awoken by a sound downstairs, and discovers a man in Amy's office, going through her work documents. Instinctively, David confronts the man and a fight begins. But not a fight between a stay-at-home dad and a common burglar. No, this is a fight out of a Bourne movie and it is intense. David wins, but barely. He tries to explain to the cops that this guy was no ordinary burglar but they mostly ignore him, especially when they find out what he does for a "living."
We now discover that David is a former Solo Ops officer, a soldier who was routinely dropped in war zones with a specific mission. If he was caught, the US government would disavow all knowledge of him. David was honorably discharged after too many missions and was excited for a quiet, normal life.
However, with Dante Payne now targeting Amy and her family, David decides to reactivate himself and take the fight to the vicious criminal lord. And Dante Payne has no idea who he's just crossed.
Secret societies, spooky scientists and shuddery scenarios abound as SallyÕs Wasteland crusade reaches its epic conclusion, but what does this mean for our butt-kicking heroine? Will she save the world and bag the dude of her dreams to boot? Find out all and more in this nail-biting final issue!
Victor Gischler is a master of the class-act literary spoof, and his work has drawn comparison to that of Douglas Adams, Kurt Vonnegut, and Thomas Pynchon. Now, Gischler turns his attention to werewolves, alchemists, ghosts, witches, and gun-toting Jesuit priests in Vampire a Go-Go, a hilarious romp of spooky, Gothic entertainment. Narrated by a ghost whose spirit is chained to a mysterious castle in Prague, Gischler's latest is full of twists and surprises that will have readers screaming -- and laughing -- for more.
When Tommy takes off on a treasure hunt to the forbidden city of New Orleans, Sally follows the boy she loves on his expedition, because hell knows he canÕt take care of himselfÉ!
A satirical popcorn adventure, punctuated with garish set pieces and bawdy one-liners, Sally of the Wasteland is intended for the enjoyment Ð and delight Ð of mature audiences!
Collects Sally of the Wasteland 1-5
New Orleans ainÕt what it used to beÉ Long gone are the jazz bands, boutiques and Mardi Gras mayhem, leaving only rubble and mutants in their wake. With their goal in sight, Sally and her crew are gonna need a little more luck if theyÕre hoping to navigate the city in one piece. Better get those guns loaded, ladies!