A parody of the wildly popular Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy, Fifty Ways to Slay tells a twisted love story that proves no matter what your background, we can all be seduced by the dark side.
Welcome back to the absurd yet joyful world of Miles Kington's legendary Franglais guides! C’est une des grande mixtures de l’histoire, comme gin et tonique, oeuf et bacon, ou les deux Ronnies. Cette combinaison de Français et Anglais vous permet une expérience mind-blowing.
MAINTENANT UNE SCRATCH ET SNIFF ÉDITION EBOOK SPECIALE! CHOIX DE TROIS FLAVOURS: GAULOISE/VINAIGRETTE/TARTE TATIN
Si vous comprenez le blurb, essayez l’interieur.
Vous ne serez pas le loser.
Miles Kington was one of Britain’s most renowned and best loved journalists. Born in County Down, he grew up in Wales and was educated in Scotland, which was all a big mistake as he was actually English. A presenter, playwright, polymath and wit, he wrote columns for The Times, the Independent, Punch and The Oldie. His other acclaimed titles include Someone Like Me, How Shall I Tell the Dog? and The Franglais Lieutenant's Woman.
There have been many interpretations of the Old Testament over the centuries but never one quite like this. Spike Milligan has rewritten, in his own inimitable style, many of the best-known stories of the Old Testament, featuring characters like King "my brain hurts" Solomon, the great oaf of a giant Goliath and the lesser-known crossword clue, Hushai the Archite.
Believers and non-believers alike will enjoy this hilarious re-working, where the jokes, jests and jibes tumble over each other from Chapter One, Verse One until kingdom come.
After creating the popular Franglais! series, Miles Kington always had an ambition: to write a book in English as well.
An “endlessly curious and observant hack”, as he described himself, here a gentle wit and wide-ranging intelligence are brought to bear on everything from the curious geography of Jersey to anthropological studies on German prisoners of war; from an interview with the Mona Lisa to why there’s no such thing as a good jazz singer, via an interrogation of Nostradamus.
Originally written for a wide range of publications, these pieces show Kington really letting his hair down, largely on the grounds that he never expected anyone to read them anyway. Together, they form an effervescent collection of light verse, memoir and listicles (yes, he was there first). In Miles and Miles we have a demonstration of a comic master at work, and a testament to the timeless class of one of Britain’s most-loved humorists.
Hubris Towers is a fresh comedy series released regularly in 45-55 page episodes. Visit byfaroe.com/hubris for more information and to sign up for updates on new releases and exclusive deals.
With his reputation staked on an impossible intercom repair and a frenetic training schedule devised specially by his conniving boss Mr. Schwartz, it's going to be all Jimmy can do to keep his head above water on his first day at Hubris Towers.
Add a growing list of errands, a band of Russians, a Frenchman, a duckling, and some very poor directions, and Jimmy will need every ounce of luck and ingenuity he can muster—and maybe a little help from his new friends—if he's going to have any chance of staying at Hubris Towers.
And then there’s the little matter of his hat...
This is the second installment of Hubris Towers, a fresh comedy series released regularly in 45-55 page episodes. Visit byfaroe.com/hubris for more information and to sign up for updates on new releases and exclusive deals.
For mature (and not so mature) audiences. Approximately 3,400 words in all.
These things always blow over, of course, but it’s still best to investigate, if only to satisfy the tenants. Little does Jimmy know the stakes are about to be raised and new alliances formed as his investigation turns up rather more than he wanted to know about Hubris Towers and Ana makes a disturbing discovery of her own.
At least there’s Mrs. Plover’s pie to look forward to. There’s no way pie can go wrong. Right?
This is the fourth installment in Hubris Towers, a comedy series for fans of P. G. Wodehouse and Fawlty Towers. If you’re new to the series, sign up at byfaroe.com/hubris to try the first two episodes on us.
Equipment hogs, nudist senior citizens and smelly dudes with attitudes, oh my!
Gym Etiquette covers what a lot of people have been thinking all along, such as:
Simple steps and common sense provide a better gym experience for everyone. Abide by these unspoken rules of gym etiquette to make the gym safe and fun....or at least have a few good laughs!
Go into your next workout fully prepared! Scroll Up and Click the Buy Button to Get Your Copy TODAY!
Comedy of manners meets comedy of errors in this madcap series for fans of Fawlty Towers and P. G. Wodehouse.
When Jimmy Acorn applies to become the new concierge at Hubris Towers, there are a few things he doesn’t know. He doesn’t know how he’s going to make rent. He doesn’t know why wealthy tenants would move into a half-constructed building. And he doesn’t know, strictly speaking, just what a concierge does.
What he does know is that eviction is looming and a PhD in literature isn’t nearly as marketable as he’d hoped, so any job will do. But a life of conciergery at Hubris Towers isn’t just any job. On paper, it’s the future of luxury living. In practice, there are still a few kinks to work out.
Set aside the manager’s grim courtesies and the incomprehensible intercom, get past the infuriatingly helpful bellhop, and Jimmy still finds himself juggling eccentric tenants, a looming inspection, and shadowy underworld connections. And in the midst of it all, he needs to look sharp and stay un-awkward, just in case the lovely Ms. Leonelle breezes by.
Nevertheless, with a little luck, a lot of hard work, and the help of an unexpected band of friends, Jimmy will find a way through, even if he does get a little damp or...well, sombreroed in the process.
This volume contains all eight episodes of Hubris Towers Season 1, previously released individually. Plus, the winter holidays come to Hubris Towers in an all-new bonus short.
It’s an exciting night at Hubris Towers: Jimmy’s got a hot date, the inspection is in full swing, and Gustav’s got a fire axe. Not all at once might have been a better idea, of course. The stakes have never been higher as Jimmy juggles romance and remote crisis control in the madcap finale of Hubris Towers Season 1.
This is the eighth installment in Hubris Towers, a comedy series for fans of P. G. Wodehouse and Fawlty Towers. If you’re new to the series, sign up at byfaroe.com/hubris to try the first two episodes on us.
Borges Svelt wasn’t about to hit the New York Times’ bestseller list anytime soon. Heavens no! He was one of those dreadful self-published authors (eek!), shunned by the industry and despised by his traditionally published peers. Like them, he was eccentric in many ways, from his tacky, plaid socks that doubled as hand warmers to naming every member of the Brady Bunch whenever he reached a mental roadblock. While some writers prefer to stand while they write or sail the seven seas while banging away on their trusty typewriter, Borges felt right at home on his shiny, porcelain throne. Of course, he didn’t mount the toilet with all of his clothes on. That would suggest that he was the least bit sane. On the contrary, he did not wear a shred of clothing. He was the pantless author, ready for anything that came rumbling through his feeble brain…or lower intestine.
For mature (and not so mature) audiences. Approximately 5,200 words.
Intended for mature (and not so mature) audiences. Approximately 2,300 words.
EXCERPT FROM THE CHAPPED-ASS CRITIC
“Doc, you’ve got to help me,” a thin, wiry man named Zack Pimpton bent over the padded table and rubbed his behind. “My ass hurts really, really bad. I think I might have broken it.” A bead of sweat trickled down his forehead.
“How did this happen?” Dr. Marsh asked.
“I don't know. I was typing up a review when suddenly my butt began to hurt. At first it stung just a little. I tried ignoring it, but it got worse and worse until I eventually found myself here. It's terrible! I can’t believe I was able to drive over here.” He tried sitting and recoiled immediately.
“Well, you're in luck! It's nothing life-threatening, that’s for sure, but I'm afraid you won’t have use of your buttocks again,” the portly doctor cracked a smile.
Willidau has taken leave of his senses to spend one day taking care of himself. Ken Willidau’s philosophy is that if you can’t get away from yourself take yourself away from you. Willidau treats himself fairly on his off day, amusing himself with all the things life has had to offer and throws it back at you. And you’ll be the one caught up in his escapism.
Chapter exhibits make the day one to really remember and one to really forget. Among them, “Hall of Mirrors”, “The Food Building”, “A Rollercoaster Ride”, “The Freak Show”, “The Tunnel of Love” and “The Fireworks Extravaganza” make the day one of those once-in-a-lifetime experiences. The day is spent with a host of jokes using wit, dark humour, bottom 10 lists, tongue-in-cheek, plays on words and double entendre humour. Spending your day with Ken will take your mind off you while he goes out of his.
An Off Day In My World’s Fair is a perfect read for those times when you know what to do with yourself and you just don’t care too.
Daniel's 32-stone psychotic police sergeant father is constantly concocting ever-more obscure methods of killing him and his mother has abandoned the family to live out her life as a mermaid.
Together with child genius Ferris and school bully Dorsal, the unlikely trio must set out on an epic adventure to reunite Daniel's family and find out exactly why his father is so emotionally illiterate.
Ex takes you on a riotous and bizarre voyage down the Thames on the world's largest and most deadly wooden potato. Along the way you and Daniel will meet an outrageous array of characters including a flock of swearing ducks, a superhero-murdering grandmother and a cappuccino-swigging lion.
If you're squeamish stay far away but if you've ever seen the funny side of a bad situation, Ex will transport you to a bizarre topsy turvy world where childhood has gone so wrong that the results are gothic.
I AN DISTRACTED BY:
Comments sent in by my listeners:
'Once I took some black puddings out of the freezer only to find a mole! I had found it in the garden and intended to send it to Chris Packham for Springwatch' Mrs D
'My mum said women of a certain age shouldn't wear beige jackets as from the back they look like a baked potato.' Lorna - Edinburgh
Travelling back in time:
I don't want to be a killjoy, but I remember a time before duvets were the norm, so I'm already apprehensive. And bearing in mind the lack of female toilets now, basic needs are going to be tricky.
Children, drunks and leggings NEVER lie
The Atom Bomb
The idea of 'the bomb' had me awake for years. I felt it might be up to me to get the cellar ready, but Mum was rather casual about the whole thing
I am genuinely distracted by everything, and I don't think I'm alone in this. I consider my love of distraction a thing to be cherished.
Like the annuals of my youth, this book is filled with puzzles, activities and mental musings. I hope that every page tickles your fancy. This book might be a perfect conversation starter at a dinner table, or the last thing you're flipping through before bed. I promise that you'll laugh at least once.
So here we go. I am passing my distractions on to you.
The fans who have already been distracted by Liza's new book . . .
'It's wonderful!' Harry Hill
'The perfect gift' Dawn French
'Utterly glorious' India Knight
'I do love Liza Tarbuck so' Miranda Hart
'National treasure' Sue Perkins
But there is another way… Everything about yourself that made you fail, that prevented you from taking control of your life — why not embrace it? Why not revel it? Why not wallow in it like a pig in mud? (Yes, mud — not what YOU were thinking!)
In short, why not admit it right now: Yes, You ARE A Monster!
In this searing, heartfelt, and mostly duplicitous book, insane author Edweard Deadwitt lays it all out: how to admit that you are a monster, and how to be the monster that you really, deep down, are.
Develop a plan for either taking over or destroying the world! Learn how best to employ a cloak or mask to accentuate your monstrousness! Find a use for that evil-looking wart you’ve been trying to sum up the courage to see the doctor about! Finally, you can stop trying, and just wallow in everything about yourself that makes you NOT fit in!