High Conflict: Why We Get Trapped and How We Get Out

Amanda Ripley

Apr 2021 · Sold by Simon and Schuster

About this ebook

A “compulsively readable” (Evan Osnos, National Book Award–winning author) book from the New York Times bestselling author of The Unthinkable and award-winning journalist Amanda Ripley investigating how good people get captured by high conflict—and how they break free.

When we are baffled by the insanity of the “other side”—in our politics, at work, or at home—it’s because we aren’t seeing how the conflict itself has taken over. That’s what “high conflict” does. High conflict is what happens when discord distills into a good-versus-evil kind of feud, the kind with an us and a them. In this state, the brain behaves differently. We feel increasingly certain of our own superiority, and everything we do to try to end the conflict, usually makes it worse. Eventually, we can start to mimic the behavior of our adversaries, harming what we hold most dear.

Our journey spans California, Chicago, Colombia, New York, and beyond, following people caught in political feuds, gang vendettas, and deep ideological divides as they confront the stories fueling their conflicts and seek a path forward. All these people, in dramatically different situations, were drawn into high conflict by similar forces, including conflict entrepreneurs, humiliation, and false binaries. But ultimately, all of them found ways to transform high conflict into good conflict, the kind that made them better people. They rehumanized and recatego­rized their opponents, and they revived curiosity and wonder, even as they continued to fight for what they knew was right.

People do escape high conflict. Individuals—even entire communities—can short-circuit the feedback loops of outrage and blame, if they want to. “Insightful and enthralling” (The New York Times Book Review) High Conflict provides a mind-opening new way to think about conflict that will transform how we move through the world.

Ratings and reviews

This work is important for anyone who wants to understand people better, or for those who feel like they aren't being heard. I would recommend this as reading for literally everyone.

This book addresses the powerful motivations that fuel conflict. It helps you make sense of the world, and if you're brave, make sense of your own behavior!

مادر هرچی ایرانیه سگ گایید تنظیمات گوشی منو عوض نکن بیناموس فیس بوک و اینستاگرام من کو من اجازه ندادم به‌گوگل به اس ام اس و کالم دسترسی داشته باشه خونه زندگی من کو کس مادرا من دارو نمیخوام‌خونه میخوام پول میخوام کارای کیریتون با صاحب کارای کیریتون و نمیخوام مادر سگ اگه آدم دوست و خونواده و وطن داشته باشه تو خیابون نمیخوابه بهش دارو بدن بیناموس تو خیابون دوای کیر و خایه بهش نمیدن موقع رانندگی بهش دارو نمیدن آدم دوست و خونواده دار یه شب بیرون میخوابه نه یه سال یه کار عوض میکنه نه صدتا

About the author

Amanda Ripley is the New York Times bestselling author of The Smartest Kids in the World, High Conflict, and The Unthinkable. She writes for The Atlantic, Politico, The Washington Post, The New York Times, and The Wall Street Journal, among other publications.