Cheetahs Never Win: A Magical Romantic Comedy (with a body count)

Pen & Page Publishing
2
Free sample

Witnessing a double homicide dumps Aaron Clinton into the middle of a gruesome murder investigation. To stop the budding serial killer from striking again, Aaron’s forced to join forces with a reformed cop and a colony of cranky cats.

Warning: this novel contains cats, murder, more cats, mayhem, cheetahs, mischief, felines, a serial killer, romance, humor, puns, generalized hilarity, and whipped cream used in inappropriate fashions. Proceed with caution. 

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About the author

RJ Blain suffers from a Moleskine journal obsession, a pen fixation, and a terrible tendency to pun without warning.

In her spare time, she daydreams about being a spy. Her contingency plan involves tying her best of enemies to spinning wheels and quoting James Bond villains until satisfied.
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Additional Information

Publisher
Pen & Page Publishing
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Published on
Jan 2, 2019
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Pages
373
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Language
English
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Genres
Fiction / Fantasy / Humorous
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Content Protection
This content is DRM protected.
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Read Aloud
Available on Android devices
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Eligible for Family Library

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This collection contains four novels and three novellas, including Playing with Fire, Hoofin' It, Serial Killer Princess, Whatever for Hire, Hearth, Home, and Havoc, Owl Be Yours, and Fowl Play.


Playing with Fire


What do you get when you mix gorgons, an incubus, and the Calamity Queen? Trouble, and lots of it. 


For Bailey, catering to the magical is a tough gig on a good day, but she has few other options. She can either keep spiking drinks with pixie dust to keep the locals happy, or spend the rest of her life cleaning up some of the world’s nastiest magical substances. 


Years after helping Police Chief Samuel Quinn escape an unhappy marriage, Bailey is once again entangled in his personal affairs. To make matters worse, Quinn’s ex-wife is angling for revenge, tossing Bailey into the deep end along with her sexiest enemy.


Hoofin' It


All Shane wanted was to get away from the wreckage of his career for a while. He picked New York City to provide him with a distraction from his early, unwanted retirement from the police force.


New York City delivered, distracting him with three corpses and a miniature llama with a spitting problem and an attitude. If he wants to return to a normal life, he’ll have to face off against a sex trafficking ring targeting the woman of his dreams, ancient vampires, murderous criminals, his parents, and an FBI agent with a hidden agenda.


Some days, it isn’t easy being an ex-cop.


Serial Killer Princess


Why would anyone put a mermaid and a gorgon in the same room together? While Tulip enjoys being alive, her lineage brings her nothing but trouble.


Snakes eat fish, and the mer love tearing apart their serpentine nemeses with their hands and teeth. As for the gorgons… she’d rather not think about them at all.


The last thing Tulip wants is to rule the mer kingdom. First, she can barely swim. Second, she’s packing more than her fair share of her father’s genes. Third, what is a landlocked princess supposed to do with an aquatic kingdom?


If she gets her way, nothing. Add in her dirty little serial killing secret, and she’s an international disaster waiting to happen.


Whatever for Hire


Fetching a cat out of a tree should’ve been a quick, easy fifty bucks in Kanika’s pocket. Instead, following one stray thought, the devil pays her a visit and leaves her with a debt to repay. 


Hearth, Home, and Havoc


Dakota never intended to become the single mother of a goddess. To make matters worse, her daughter hadn’t quite figured out her role in the grand scheme of things.


Havoc isn’t supposed to be part of Hestia’s portfolio, but where the young goddess of the hearth and home goes, trouble surely follows.


When Dakota’s ex-husband barrels his way back into her life, a heavy dose of havoc is just what the doctor ordered. She just never expected to find love in the midst of murder.


Owl Be Yours


After a wildfire took everything from her, Emily Hall made do surviving as a homeless human by day and as an owl at night. When one of the men responsible for infecting her with lycanthropy comes winging his way back into her life, she must choose between revenge or resuming a normal life.


Until Daniel’s return, she never dreamed she might be able to have both.


Fowl Play


Instead of a quiet dance retreat where she could escape the insanity of being the daughter of an angel, a succubus, and a lycanthrope, Emma Sansaul plummets into the middle of murder, mayhem, and mischief. As becoming the next victim of a crazed serial killer is not on her itinerary, she's left with no choice but to join forces with Agent Kenneth Bernard to find the murderer, the one man on Earth capable of making her hissing mad one second and in need of a cold shower the next.

From award-winning author Tamara Grantham comes a boxed set of the first three full-length Fairy World M.D. books. This set includes exclusive bonus content, and offers the reader a discount over purchasing each novel individually. The Fairy World M.D. series is a multi-award-winning, best-selling urban fantasy fairytale series with over three hundred five-star reviews on Amazon. This series is richly written, populated with engaging characters and plotlines, and is perfect for fans of Magic Bites, The Kate Daniels series by Ilona Andrews.BONUS CONTENT

Mirror Box – New Short Story!

Two years before Olive encounters the Dreamthief, she’s working in Boston to create her mirror box, which she’ll use to diagnose her patients. But when she tests it, she’s transported to another place—an unknown world that is neither Earth nor Faythander. There she encounters some Wults returning from a hunting expedition on Earth—and Kull is among them. They are tracking a magical beast that has been stalking their people, and following them may mean Olive will return to earth—but if she does, she’ll lose all her memories…

BOOK 1

Dreamthief: An Urban Fantasy Fairytale (Fairy World MD Book 1)

Forget the fairies and unicorns, most people return from fairy world with lost memories and mental problems. Olive Kennedy knows. She's the therapist who treats patients suffering from Faythander's side effects. Traveling back to the fairy realm wasn't on Olive's to-do list. But she has no choice. The fate of both Earth and Fairy depends on her ability to stop an ancient being called the Dreamthief. To complicate matters, she may be losing her heart to someone who can't love her in return. Saving the world, she can handle. Falling in love—not so much.

BOOK 2

Spellweaver: An Urban Fantasy Fairytale (Fairy World MD Book 2)

Olive's to-do list: Pay the rent, feed the cat, and save Faythander. Again. 

When the fairy realm faces a new, terrifying threat from a goblin Spellweaver, Olive Kennedy leaves her home in Houston to travel through the most dangerous places in Faythander to confront him. Along the way, she learns that history is a muddled subject—especially when elves are involved. Her only comfort comes from Kull, her Viking warrior sidekick—who somehow negates her bad fortune. Yet, how long can their relationship last when his past is brought to light? 

BOOK 3

Bloodthorn: An Urban Fantasy Fairytale (Fairy World MD Book 3)

Short on cash, fairy world therapist Olive Kennedy resorts to finding clients at the Texas Renaissance Festival. When she discovers the corpse of her client's husband discarded in her booth, she realizes that earning her next paycheck is the least of her worries. Even worse, Olive learns the murderer may be a magical monster from the fairy realm. The fae and their escorts arrive from Faythander to aid in the investigation, but they do not travel alone. Olive must confront the one person she never wished to see again. Kull—her ex. 
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