Oh, and an interplanetary terraced house.
Martin Laws hates mysteries.
So why has someone sent him a bag of juggling balls?
Why has he no memory of buying a new computer?
Why has that new computer decided Martin needs to go shopping?
Why does a hairstylist he's never met before keep saluting him?
Most of all, why are so many Elvis impersonators trying to kill him?
David Hadley was born in 1959. He is married with three children and lives in the Black Country, West Midlands, UK.
What could be a better way of getting an ex-girlfriend back than a magic carpet ride through the night to a romantic evening together in some alternate dimension? That is, providing you can find something to do with the extraneous duck.
Tony Merling wants to get his girlfriend back any way he can, even if it means learning to fly a magic carpet without falling off.
But Suzi knows Tony will never fulfil the potential she thought she once saw in him.
That is until the mysterious stranger Morgan reveals that Tony has a power no-one else on this Earth possesses.
But Morgan is on the run and the strange creatures chasing him will not give up their pursuit, even if it means chasing Morgan, Tony and Suzi to the death across many possible realities. Fleeing to a dimension where it depends on Tony and his newly-discovered powers to save them all from drowning in a sea of custard and bring them home to Earth.
To solve the mystery, the UK’s Central Perversion Enforcement Directorate has no choice but to call in the directorate’s leading investigators and experts in all that is rude and naughty: Norbert Trouser-Quandary and his wife Maureen, from the village of Little Frigging in the Wold.
With expert help from DCI Lyn Choiry of the Metropolitan Police, Norbert and Maureen must discover who has stolen the Golden Sex Spatula and return it to the Museum as soon as possible.
But they find out that the Golden Sex Spatula has been taken by the world’s most powerful erotic secret society, intent on unleashing Golden Sex Spatula’s overwhelming erotic potential for themselves.
Now, Norbert, Maureen and Lyn must risk everything, including their lives, as they battle the unseen forces of the secret society to get the precious erotic artefact back before it is too late for everyone.
If they do not recapture it in time, then the secret society could use the power of the Golden Sex Spatula to destroy all the erotic potential in the universe, bringing about the end of the world as we know it.
[A novella: 33 000 words - 142 Pages]
Plus other stories, such as: 'Feeling Betrayed', 'The Aftermath', 'The Perfect Woman' and others the like of which you will never have read before.