In this book, Kaye talks about the journey she and her daughter went through together, and how in the end, nothing she did changed the outcome. She shares some articles she wrote in the years following her loss to help people understand what parents go through with a drug-addicted child.
Kaye has also included a number of heart-wrenching writings that Jennifer gave to her to share with others in hopes that they would read about her pain and not have her daily struggles of survival. One passage includes these words of despair and hope:
What have I ever done to you to deserve all this pain and agony? You have taken everything from me. My family’s trust, my family’s sleep, my sleep, my apartment, car, jewelry, etc. But worst of all you’ve taken my sanity, my life, and me. I think of you every day. I even dream about you at night. I’m sure your only thoughts about me are to totally destroy me. I love you yet hate you so much. No matter how hard I fight, you are stronger. I’m 19 but feel 69 because of you. You have robbed me of my childhood. Because of you I have killed, robbed, sold drugs, sold myself, and hurt everyone close to me. You’re a liar!!!! You swore you would make things easier for me. You swore I wouldn’t have to worry about anything. You promised fun and heaven. But all you have given me is hurt and agony and a living hell. This is my life and I’m taking it back. I’m going to win this battle. I PROMISE.
The book is comforting to parents who continue to suffer from shame, guilt, and feelings of helplessness. They will realize they are not alone--and they are not responsible.