The Tender Heart: Conquering Your Insecurity

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Insight, explanations, and practical solutions for overcoming insecurity and sensitivity -- from a top psychologist
In simple language, Joseph Nowinski explains that insecurity is not a flaw or shortcoming, but rather a personality trait that reflects both temperament and life experiences. And, most important, he shows how insecurity can be conquered so that one can thrive -- especially in work and love.
The first book to investigate insecurity, The Tender Heart sheds light on its common causes and provides guidelines for overcoming the self-doubt, debilitating self-consciousness, and chronic lack of confidence that prevent many people from enjoying life to its fullest. Combining personality quizzes and case histories of people who have conquered their insecurities, The Tender Heart offers expert advice on:
  • Healing insecurity
  • Avoiding emotional predators who seek out sensitive people
  • Coping with a tough-hearted partner or colleague
  • Finding your emotional mate
  • Raising children who are self-confident

The Tender Heart is for anyone who has experienced times when their own insecurity or the insecurity of others has interfered with valued relationships or prevented them from realizing their potential.
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About the author

Joseph Nowinski, Ph.D., is a psychologist at the University of Connecticut Health Center, a practitioner in private practice in Tolland, Connecticut, where he lives, & founder of the Institute for the Study of Interpersonal Sensitivity.

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Additional Information

Publisher
Simon and Schuster
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Published on
May 13, 2001
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Pages
240
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ISBN
9780743214841
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Language
English
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Genres
Psychology / Emotions
Self-Help / General
Self-Help / Personal Growth / Self-Esteem
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Content Protection
This content is DRM protected.
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Eligible for Family Library

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Following the success of Drop the Pink Elephant, Bill McFarlan and leading psychiatrist Dr Alex Yellowlees from The Priory, offer explanations about what affects confidence and practical advice to build confidence to become a happy, well-rounded individual. Whether you are leading a high powered corporate lifestyle, at home raising a family, studying at university or unemployed Are You Good Enough? will help to create confidence and boost it so that you reach your goals, banish low self- esteem and eliminate self-doubt, explained in terms that all can understand.

Imagine being able to replace negatives with positives, having clarity and being able to pay and accept compliments with sincerity. Think about how good it would be to be direct with your manager about being overworked on your project and not being able to make a deadline without feeling anxiety and stress. Gain knowledge in pruning friendships from unhealthy “all take” and “no give “ to healthy balanced friendships. Learn how to boost your own confidence and pass your awareness of self-esteem onto your children, encouraging them to thrive and be confident adults. It is not possible to alter the past and your own set of circumstances that had detrimental consequences on your mindset but it is within your grasp to learn how to change your attitude and outlook to become that contented, confident person you would like to be. Let Are You Good Enough? based on real life experiences, triumphs and tragedies and solutions to deep-seated problems, show you how.

Esteem is a simple word. It is worth and value that we apply to people, places, and situations. It is the amount of respect we assess. We have esteem for our world leaders. We have esteem for places like church and synagogue. We have esteem for an exemplary performance whether it is in sports, acting, or simply doing the right thing. But the most important place we need to apply esteem is within ourselves. We must maintain our self-esteem in order to place value on ourselves as a worthy individual in the world. Self-esteem can affect every single part of our lives. If that esteem is low, our lives will be dull and gray. Elevating esteem for ourselves could very well be the key to happiness in life. Most people's feelings and thoughts about themselves fluctuate somewhat based on their daily experiences. The grade you get on an exam, how your friends treat you, ups and downs in a romantic relationship-all can have a temporary impact on your well-being. Your own self-esteem, however, is something more fundamental than the normal "ups and downs" associated with situational changes. For people with good basic self-esteem, normal "ups and downs" may lead to temporary fluctuations in how they feel about themselves, but only to a limited extent. In contrast, for people with poor basic self-esteem, these "ups and downs" may make all the difference in the world. People with poor self-esteem often rely on how they are doing in the present to determine how they feel about themselves. They need positive external experiences to counteract the negative feelings and thoughts that constantly plague them. Even then, the good feeling (from a good grade, etc.) can be temporary. Healthy self-esteem is based on our ability to assess ourselves accurately (know ourselves) and still be able to accept and to value ourselves unconditionally.
#1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • When we deny our stories, they define us. When we own our stories, we get to write the ending.

Don’t miss the hourlong Netflix special Brené Brown: The Call to Courage!

Social scientist Brené Brown has ignited a global conversation on courage, vulnerability, shame, and worthiness. Her pioneering work uncovered a profound truth: Vulnerability—the willingness to show up and be seen with no guarantee of outcome—is the only path to more love, belonging, creativity, and joy. But living a brave life is not always easy: We are, inevitably, going to stumble and fall.

It is the rise from falling that Brown takes as her subject in Rising Strong. As a grounded theory researcher, Brown has listened as a range of people—from leaders in Fortune 500 companies and the military to artists, couples in long-term relationships, teachers, and parents—shared their stories of being brave, falling, and getting back up. She asked herself, What do these people with strong and loving relationships, leaders nurturing creativity, artists pushing innovation, and clergy walking with people through faith and mystery have in common? The answer was clear: They recognize the power of emotion and they’re not afraid to lean in to discomfort.

Walking into our stories of hurt can feel dangerous. But the process of regaining our footing in the midst of struggle is where our courage is tested and our values are forged. Our stories of struggle can be big ones, like the loss of a job or the end of a relationship, or smaller ones, like a conflict with a friend or colleague. Regardless of magnitude or circumstance, the rising strong process is the same: We reckon with our emotions and get curious about what we’re feeling; we rumble with our stories until we get to a place of truth; and we live this process, every day, until it becomes a practice and creates nothing short of a revolution in our lives. Rising strong after a fall is how we cultivate wholeheartedness. It’s the process, Brown writes, that teaches us the most about who we are.

ONE OF GREATER GOOD’S FAVORITE BOOKS OF THE YEAR

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