Do You Really Get Me?: Finding Value in Yourself and Others through Empathy and Connection

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Through his I-Maximum Approach, Dr. Shrand helps readers learn how to set aside self-doubt, show others they are valued, and make more meaningful connections.

Through his I-Maximum Approach, Dr. Shrand helps readers learn how to set aside self-doubt, show others they are valued, and make more meaningful connections.In a sense, we all try to be mind readers. We “theorize” about whether we are admired or envied, despised or loved. Psychologists use the term “Theory of Mind” to describe our natural tendency to make assumptions about what others think and how they feel about us based on the tone of their voice, facial expressions, and body language. These cues either signal us to open up further and make a connection or to put up a wall to protect ourselves from rejection. But it is also easy to misinterpret these cues and become unnecessarily guarded, such as when someone appears to be angry with us and we later learn they were just having a bad day and the negative signs we were picking up really had nothing to do with us.The more emotional baggage we bring to our interactions, the more likely we are to negatively misinterpret other people’s feelings and the more disconnected from them we become. In this groundbreaking book, Joseph Shrand, MD, instructor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, and Leigh Devine teach us that by setting aside self-doubt and assuming the best about ourselves and others, we can make more meaningful connections based on mutual respect and value. This is the heart of Dr. Shrand’s I-Maximum Approach, which teaches us to assume that we all are doing the best we can at any given time. With the heightened empathy that we gain from this approach comes a deeper understanding of our own and others’ mental and emotional states and how they influence our interactions, resulting in stronger connections and more rewarding relationships.
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About the author

Joseph Shrand, MD, is an instructor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. He supervises psychiatry residents for Harvard South Shore and applies his I-M Approach as medical director of CASTLE (Clean And Sober Teens Living Empowered), part of High Point Treatment Center. He is the author of The Fear Reflex and Outsmarting Anger with Leigh Devine. Leigh Devine is a master of science from Columbia University Graduate School of Journalism and has written and produced many notable publications and documentary programs specializing in psychology, medicine, and science.
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Additional Information

Publisher
Simon and Schuster
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Published on
Sep 8, 2015
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Pages
200
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ISBN
9781616496234
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Features
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Language
English
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Genres
Self-Help / Personal Growth / General
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Content Protection
This content is DRM protected.
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Eligible for Family Library

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Joseph Shrand
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This book aims to give readers a full understanding of the how and why of the human stress response. While once a vital ancient survival tool, our biological stress response may now be in overdrive when confronted by the modern world around us. Research has repeatedly shown that stress can cause physical illness if undetected and unmanaged.

And is not always your stress that gets in the way of your success and happiness. Usually it is someone else's stress that gets in the way of your success and happiness. What can you do to help someone else with their stress so you can both be more successful?

Dr. Shrand addresses the deeper biological and survival reasons we experience stress, exploring ways to relieve your own stress but at the same time breaking new ground when he demonstrates how helping someone else with their stress actually helps you to be more successful -- because you are seen as benefactor, a person of value.
The underlying biological roots of stress have to do with survival -- we feel stress when we worry we are inadequate to the task ahead of us. If we feel inadequate can we still retain our value to the group on which we depend, or will be cast out to fend for ourselves in a world of predators. Managing your stress in the modern-day world has to include managing the stress of those around you, and this book will show you how!

This book provides readers with psychological and physical strategies necessary to keep stress from undermining their health, their joy, and the happiness of those around them. These simple and practical strategies help relieve our stress, and the stress of those around us.

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