Text Me, Cupid: All Four Scandalous Episodes

GENRES were made to be BROKEN
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HOLIDAY STRESS HAS NEVER BEEN THIS HOT


Meet Florence: I’ve done this before, looking for a partner or soul mate or someone-to-grow-to-love, and you know what? I’m done with that. Honestly. I’m just looking for some casual sex.  All I’m interested in is a one-night stand, or several—not all of them with you. Just making it clear that I’m interested in playing with multiple partners. I don’t want to get attached and I don’t want you to get attached.  


Meet Will: I’m reeling from a recent divorce and incapable of having a meaningful relationship, possibly even a meaningful conversation. The only upside to my situation is that after fifteen years of monogamy I get to chase all the strange I want.


He’s freshly divorced and in denial. She's twice-burnt and prickly. They’re a terrible idea. They know this. But every time their eyes meet, their clothes come off. Still—they’re not going to fall in love. They are not.


Not even if this one night stand has 365 days.  

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About the author

M. JANE COLETTE writes tragedy for those who like to laugh, comedy for the melancholy, and erotica for people who like their fantasies real. She believes rules and hearts were made to be broken; ditto the constraints of genres.

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Additional Information

Publisher
GENRES were made to be BROKEN
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Published on
Dec 3, 2018
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Pages
400
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ISBN
9781775180999
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Language
English
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Content Protection
This content is DRM free.
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Read Aloud
Available on Android devices
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Meet Will and Florence. He’s freshly divorced and in denial. She’s twice-burnt and prickly. They’re a terrible idea. They know this. But every time their eyes meet, their clothes come off. Experience their unique, hilarious, and heart-wrenching love story in the four episodes of Text Me, Cupid: a (slightly dirty) love story for 21st century adults.

In Episode 1: Messy Christmas, Florence is looking for a no-strings attached one night stand. Will thinks he’s game. Nobody’s going to fall in love. Are they? 

 

Meet Florence: “I’ve done this before, looking for a partner or soul mate or someone-to-grow-to-love, and you know what? I’m done with that. Honestly. I’m just looking for some casual sex. A one night stand. Specifically, during December, because it’s a weird season.”

 

Meet Will: “I’m reeling from a recent divorce and incapable of having a meaningful relationship. The only upside to my situation is that after fifteen years of monogamy I get to chase all the strange I want.”

 

Will has plans: In this head, she was already naked. Was she going to be covered with freckles? God, yes—freckles everywhere. He would find every single one.

 

Florence likes him: “You’re very sweet. And cute. Totally as advertised. Fit. Hair. Also, as tall as your profile said, which is a bonus. Do you know that almost all men on dating sites like about their height? They add two inches. And not just to their… you-know-what’s. Seriously.”

 

But she says it’s not going to work out: “You’re so sweet. So hot. But it’s not going to work out. I already know.”

 

Or is it?

FROM THE PUBLISHER: Twenty-five-year-old Elizabeth did not plan to break up his marriage when she had an affair with her law school professor. But she did. Fifteen years later, she’s still coming to terms with the consequences of her youthful infatuation: trying to love a stepdaughter who hates her, financially and emotionally supporting an ex-wife who will never forgive the betrayal, and enduring the relentless overtures of a sister-in-law who’s determined to be her best friend. As her sister-in-law plunges into a reckless affair and her stepdaughter aggressively explores her sexuality, Elizabeth finds herself forced to reconsider her definition of love, commitment, and responsibility—a process that finally releases her from the shackles of her past mistakes and shows her the way to her own happily-ever-after.

TEASER

“What’s that?”
—This? Nothing. A photograph.

He looks at the photograph, and demands a story I don’t want to tell.

“Isn’t this what all women want? A lover who as passionately interested in the quotidian details of their boring, dysfunctional lives as in their desirable bodies?”

No. Not me. Or do I? I start to talk. I tell him about… about all of them. And, inadvertently, me. Things I’ve never put into words for anyone before…

“That’s the game you and I are playing. Do you not know that? I am looking for the key. You’re trying not to give it to me. But you want to play, and so you keep on talking, and so eventually, you will.”

I’m careful not to say too much. I am not going to take my sociopathic lover of the moment into the tragedy of my life.

“Why not? Tragedy is erotic. The things that make you laugh don’t arouse, lover. Check yourself.”

Really? I’m doing this? Why?

“Because you want to. Because you’re compelled. Does it matter? Just talk.”
So. I do.
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