Sisters have made tormenting each other a virtual art form, despite their familial love. Their emotional and mental tricks can make the physical torture brothers inflict on one another seem like child's play.
Finally girls and women have somewhere to turn when they run out of ideas for making their sisters miserable: How to Ruin Your Sister's Life. Author Mary McHugh's hilarious, sometimes outrageous suggestions provide all the guidance these girls need, whether they're 16 or 60. A few examples:
* Marry her boyfriend.
* Throw away the heads of all her Barbie dolls.
* Sob loudly throughout her wedding.
* Tell your 13-year-old sister's boyfriend that she still sucks her thumb.
* Cut up her Christmas stocking and flush it down the toilet.
* Take a picture of your 55-year-old sister nude, brushing her teeth.
Of course, the best defense is to buy this book before your sister does!
Mary McHugh is a writer and regular contributor to SeniorWomen.com. She is the author of 15 books, including How Not to Become a Little Old Lady. Mary has written for Good Housekeeping, the New York Times, and Family Circle.Online:
In this entertaining collection there are sisters ranging from the loving Bronts to the scrapping Mitfords (who could never remember who was in and who was out of favour), to the Pankhursts (who fought for women's suffrage only to fall out with each other), to sisters of Lenin and Hitler, and of Kings and Queens. There are sisters whose job it is to compete with each other, such as Venus and Serena Williams. 'It wasn't fun eliminating my little sister, but I have to be tough', said Venus.
A Lewis Carroll poem says, 'never stew your sister'. If cooking her isn't allowed, what is the worst thing you can do to your sister? If you want to make sure she'll never forgive you, pinch her man or borrow her clothes.
If you don't understand how a woman could love her sister dearly yet still want to wring her neck, then you were probably an only child.
Mom Loves Me Best (And Other Lies You Told Your Sister) humorously exposes all the intricacies and intrigue shared between sisters, the only beings on earth who share family history, the same DNA, similar bone structure, and contempt for insufferable Aunt Gertie. Author Linda Sunshine's razor-sharp wit and humor reveals all aspects of sister relationships, from birth order and sibling rivalries to reasons why your sister's grass is always greener and her carpet's always cleaner.
The book includes tests for determining whether you're a good sister and tips for improving your relationship, getting your piece of action at the dinner table, and 14 surefire ways to drive your sister crazy. Mom Loves Me Best is a hilarious and knowing expose that ponders the age-old question: If she wasn't your sister, would she be your friend?
Linda includes loads of personal anecdotal ammunition. After all, she wrote this book for her sister, Susan, whom she loves, despite telling her to drop dead often enough when they were kids.
If so, here are some random things you might learn from Man vs Life. That whether we like it or not, our function in life is to facilitate family life (often grudgingly, i.e. I m not a taxi you know or you re only nice to me when you want money ).
That our children tell us we need to take a chill pill . That we all like pork belly and duck. And we will happily pick something off the floor to eat it if we feel it was only dropped in the last 48 hours.
That love, sex and friendship are all possible at once, but it s a big ask over a long period of time.
That two days sick leave is more believable than one.
Written in the style of a spoof PowerPoint business report, Man vs Life is a humorous look at the psyche of the married man in his 30s and 40s, who works in an office and is overrun by children and financial stress, and gently mocks his domestic situation and the crisis he faces on a daily basis.
Purple hair? Belly rings? Bizarre musical tastes? Not a problem as long as readers have How to Ruin Your Children's Lives' nearly 300 tips and tactics close at hand. With resident teenagers slamming doors and screaming at the top of their lungs, "Mom! You're ruining my life!" parents should at least make certain they're handling the job with poise. Consider these tips: ask them about girlfriends or boyfriends in front of relatives; run out on the basketball court with a first-aid kit if your teenager is hurt during a game; fall asleep when your teenager is telling you what Sue said to Jennifer and what Jennifer told Maryanne and what Karen did then.