Yes, You ARE A Monster

Bookship
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 You’ve tried other self-help books. You’ve tried taking control of your life. You’ve tried affirmations, to-do lists, twelve-step programs, CBT, NLP and DIY. And… you failed. Well, what did you expect? You’re YOU.

But there is another way… Everything about yourself that made you fail, that prevented you from taking control of your life — why not embrace it? Why not revel it? Why not wallow in it like a pig in mud? (Yes, mud — not what YOU were thinking!)

In short, why not admit it right now: Yes, You ARE A Monster!

In this searing, heartfelt, and mostly duplicitous book, insane author Edweard Deadwitt lays it all out: how to admit that you are a monster, and how to be the monster that you really, deep down, are.

Develop a plan for either taking over or destroying the world! Learn how best to employ a cloak or mask to accentuate your monstrousness! Find a use for that evil-looking wart you’ve been trying to sum up the courage to see the doctor about! Finally, you can stop trying, and just wallow in everything about yourself that makes you NOT fit in!

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Additional Information

Publisher
Bookship
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Published on
Mar 6, 2017
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Pages
114
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ISBN
9780993423956
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Features
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Language
English
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Genres
Fiction / Fantasy / Humorous
Humor / Form / Parodies
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Content Protection
This content is DRM protected.
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Read Aloud
Available on Android devices
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Neil Gaiman
There is a distinct hint of Armageddon in the air. According to The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch (recorded, thankfully, in 1655, before she blew up her entire village and all its inhabitants, who had gathered to watch her burn), the world will end on a Saturday. Next Saturday, in fact. So the armies of Good and Evil are amassing, the Four Bikers of the Apocalypse are revving up their mighty hogs and hitting the road, and the world's last two remaining witch-finders are getting ready to fight the good fight, armed with awkwardly antiquated instructions and stick pins. Atlantis is rising, frogs are falling, tempers are flaring. . . . Right. Everything appears to be going according to Divine Plan.

Except that a somewhat fussy angel and a fast-living demon -- each of whom has lived among Earth's mortals for many millennia and has grown rather fond of the lifestyle -- are not particularly looking forward to the coming Rapture. If Crowley and Aziraphale are going to stop it from happening, they've got to find and kill the Antichrist (which is a shame, as he's a really nice kid). There's just one glitch: someone seems to have misplaced him. . . .

First published in 1990, Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett's brilliantly dark and screamingly funny take on humankind's final judgment is back -- and just in time -- in a new hardcover edition (which includes an introduction by the authors, comments by each about the other, and answers to some still-burning questions about their wildly popular collaborative effort) that the devout and the damned alike will surely cherish until the end of all things.

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