NOT "Just Friends": Rebuilding Trust and Recovering Your Sanity After Infidelity

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One of the world’s leading experts on infidelity provides a step-by-step guide through the process of infidelity—from suspicion and revelation to healing, and provides profound, practical guidance to prevent infidelity and, if it happens, recover and heal from it.

You’re right to be cautious when you hear these words: “I’m telling you, we’re just friends.”

Good people in good marriages are having affairs. The workplace and the Internet have become fertile breeding grounds for “friendships” that can slowly and insidiously turn into love affairs. Yet you can protect your relationship from emotional or sexual betrayal by recognizing the red flags that mark the stages of slipping into an improper, dangerous intimacy that can threaten your marriage.
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About the author

Shirley P. Glass, Ph.D., one of the world's leading experts on infidelity, draws on more than two decades of original research and hundreds of clinical cases to provide a step-by-step guide through the process of infidelity -- from suspicion and revelation to healing. In addition to offering concrete advice about how to tell, what to tell, and when to tell, Dr. Glass presents eye-opening quizzes that will help you ensure safe friendships and secure marriages by exploring the vulnerabilities in your relationship and any outside influences that may put it at risk. With her profound, practical guidance, you can prevent infidelity and, if it happens, recover and heal from it.
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Additional Information

Publisher
Simon and Schuster
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Published on
Nov 1, 2007
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Pages
448
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ISBN
9781416586401
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Language
English
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Genres
Family & Relationships / Conflict Resolution
Family & Relationships / Love & Romance
Family & Relationships / Marriage & Long-Term Relationships
Self-Help / General
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Content Protection
This content is DRM protected.
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Eligible for Family Library

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Just as Masters and Johnson were pioneers in the study of human sexuality, so Dr. John Gottman has revolutionized the study of marriage. As a professor of psychology at the University of Washington and the founder and director of the Seattle Marital and Family Institute, he has studied the habits of married couples in unprecedented detail over the course of many years. His findings, and his heavily attended workshops, have already turned around thousands of faltering marriages.
        
This book is the culmination of his life's work: the seven principles that guide couples on the path toward a harmonious and long-lasting relationship. Straightforward in their approach, yet profound in their effect, these principles teach partners new and startling strategies for making their marriage work. Gottman helps couples focus on each other, on paying attention to the small day-to-day moments that, strung together, make up the heart and soul of any relationship. Being thoughtful about ordinary matters provides spouses with a solid foundation for resolving conflict when it does occur and finding strategies for living with those issues that cannot be resolved.
        
Packed with questionnaires and exercises whose effectiveness has been proven in Dr. Gottman's workshops, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the definitive guide for anyone who wants their relationship to attain its highest potential.

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the result of Dr. John Gottman's many years of closely observing thousands of marriages. This kind of longitudinal research has never been done before. Based on his findings, he has culled seven principles essential to the success of any marriage.
Maintain a love map.
Foster fondness and admiration.
Turn toward instead of away.
Accept influence.
Solve solvable conflicts.
Cope with conflicts you can't resolve.
Create shared meaning.

Dr. Gottman's unique questionnaires and exercises will guide couples on the road to revitalizing their marriage, or making a strong one even better.
Where Angels Walked is the story of Jenny Goolsby, a beautiful baby girl born with hemangioma. Through her parents faith, the support and prayers of a loving family, husband, and community, and the strength of her spirit, Jenny overcomes physical limitations to achieve personal and business successes. Most importantly, she reaches out to everyone with love, even in the midst of her own strife. Although despair could have been Jennys story, she chose to pen her life with faithfaith bright and beautiful.

A unique challenge for its author, Where Angels Walked chronicles the extraordinary defeats and triumphs of Jennys life, offering assurance and courage to those who have suffered with and lost a loved one. Jenny demonstrates with her life that it is through weakness that Gods strength can shine through.

In riveting detail, Ms. Verble writes eloquently her memories of Jenny: girlhood pretending and playing; moments of utter despair and hopelessness; and Jennys persistence to live life fully time and time again. She describes how they helped each other in life; their marriages and the children they shared; the family dinners and gatherings; and the constant stream of the love that flowed between these special, angelic sisters.

Tragically, Jennys life is shortened following a diagnosis of colon cancer. Not only does the family lose their beloved sister; they lose Dewey, Jennys devoted and loving husband. To add to this heartache, all of Jennys possessions are lost, never to be cherished by her family.

The combination of losing Jenny and what she created and worked for brought much sadness and grief to Georgia. The author began writing to explain her heartaches and her personal journey from taking full responsibility for her sisters death to final complete acceptance of it. After 10 years of writing, Where Angels Walked has been published.

This emotionally compelling personal story raises many spiritual questions about life, illness, death, and finding peace in the midst of personal nightmares. The pages are filled with detailed memories and the story contains laughter and surprise, suspense and drama, sorrow and pain; but most significant, the assurance of Gods steadfastness to his beloved children. Ms. Verble gives freely of her memories, ideas, and feelings.

Follow Jenny and Georgias journey from despair to joy, back to despair, and finally to joyful acceptance of Gods plan. Where Angels Walked is difficult to put down and impossible to forget.

Today, 50 percent of relationships will experience infidelity. Do you know the signs? If your partner is cheating, can your relationship survive? When infidelity is exposed, your world is turned upside down. Knowing how to move forward and finding the answers to all your questions can be overwhelming and difficult. Betrayed Not Broken gives you the answers you need and guides you through the emotional process from the discovery of his betrayal to making the decision to stay or go. If you make the choice to try and restore a relationship after infidelity, some things you may want to know are: What am I allowed to ask of him so I can trust again? Should I ask him to cut off the relationship with his lover right away? How long will it take to heal from infidelity and make a decision? What can add to your confusion is wondering: Should I just forgive and forget? Is it true that "once a cheater always a cheater"? Can I ask for details about the affair? Is it cheating if he didn't have sex with her?

Betrayed Not Broken is for the woman who has experienced infidelity or thinks she might have a cheating partner. It is also for the couple wanting to repair the relationship after betrayal. This guide is written in an easy-to-follow format that gives the answers you are looking for right when you need them without any psychobabble-just clear direction. Each chapter ends with questions you can ask yourself as well as provides exercises for both you and your partner as you journey past the betrayal. It's hard to know what to do once infidelity has been revealed; Betrayed Not Broken makes it easier.

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