I Will Dismember You

Megan Berry Zombie Settler

Book 7
Self Taught Ninja
Free sample

Q: What’s worse than learning that your parents have been lying to you your entire life?

A: Killer zombies on ice.

As the truth behind Megan’s powers is finally revealed, her world is turned upside down. She’s not sure of anything anymore except that her heart is utterly and completely broken.

And when a heart is broken, sometimes even good girls do bad things…

As bloodthirsty zombies crash the sweetheart skate—turning a school fundraiser into the Ice Capades from Hell—Megan must resist the urge to fight darkness with darkness or risk losing everything that matters.

Alert: I WILL DISMEMBER YOU was previously published as part of the full-length novel UNDEAD MUCH? in 2010. It has been extensively revised for this second edition told in SERIAL format. 
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Publisher
Self Taught Ninja
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Published on
Feb 21, 2016
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Pages
85
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Features
Flowing text, Google-generated PDF
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Best For
Web, Tablet, Phone, eReader
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Language
English
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Genres
Fiction / Romance / Suspense
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Content Protection
This content is DRM protected.
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Available on Android devices
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Eligible for Family Library
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Continue the series

See more
Apocalypse Nowish
Book 8
Q: When’s the best time to warn The Powers That Be of an impending zombie apocalypse?

A: Before you’re kidnapped by killer cheerleaders!

The only thing scarier than a van full of cheerleaders is a van full of black magic working cheerleaders determined to bring about the end times.

Megan is about to be sacrificed to a freaky zombie in a dark rite and the only one who can save her is the boy she pushed away.

Can she summon the magical mojo to be her own Zombie Slayer in Shining Armor? Or will an evil blast from the past put an end to her before the Happily Ever After?

Alert: APOCALYPSE NOWISH was previously published as part of the full-length novel UNDEAD MUCH? in 2010. It has been extensively revised for this second edition told in SERIAL format.
Valentine's Day of the Undead
Book 9
Q: WHAT COULD BE WORSE THAN SPENDING VALENTINE’S DAY ALONE?

A: SPENDING IT WITH EVIL ZOMBIES!!

Megan Berry is no stranger to heartbreak, but spending Valentine’s Day serving other happy couples hot dogs while mourning the loss of her one true love is almost more than even a highly trained zombie Settler can handle. So when her recently estranged boyfriend, Ethan, texts her asking her to be his Valentine, she ditches her bodyguard and rushes to his side.

But soon, Megan’s dreams of chocolates, flowers, and lingering make-up kisses take a turn of the rotted-corpse-and-maggot variety, and Megan fears that her first Valentine’s Day with Ethan may be her last.
You are So Undead To Me
Book 1
 Q: HOW MANY ZOMBIES DOES IT TAKE TO RUIN A SOCIAL LIFE?

A: NOT MANY.

Megan Berry is a Zombie Settler by birth, which means she’s destined to play part-time shrink to a bunch of semi-dead people with killer issues. All Megan really wants is to go to homecoming, but with her powers out of control and everyone from the Mean Girl Next Door to her mom to the Cutest Boy in the World on her case, it’s kinda hard to score a date.

(Let’s just say Megan’s love life could use some major resuscitation.)

She’s convinced her sophomore year can’t get any worse – until someone starts using black magic to turn average, angsty Undead into scary, hardcore flesh-eating Zombies. Now she’ll have to rise to the challenge of kicking Undead butt (while fighting a serious crush on Ethan, who truly may be THE cutest boy in the world).

Her life – and more importantly, the fate of the homecoming dance – depends on it.

Alert: YOU ARE SO UNDEAD TO ME was previously published in 2009 as a full-length title. This heavily revised second edition is told in SERIAL format with CLIFFHANGER endings. 
Smells Like Zombie Spirit
Book 2
 Q: WHAT’S MORE PATHETIC THAN HAVING A FAKE BOYFRIEND?

A: SECRETLY WISHING HE WAS A REAL ONE.

Pom squad tryouts are well underway, bloodthirsty zombies are still in too-abundant supply, someone has it in for Megan’s homecoming date and The World’s Most Perfect dress, and Megan is stuck with a tutor-babysitter-bodyguard who has decided the only way to protect her is to pretend to be her boyfriend.

And what’s the only thing more pathetic than having a fake boyfriend?

(Secretly wishing he was a real one.)

Megan’s crush on Ethan is reaching deadly proportions, but so are the zombie attacks in Carol, Arkansas. Are her skills ready to take on her biggest, scariest challenge yet?

Or will she falter in the face of a triple dose of Undead trouble?

Alert: The Megan Berry series is told in SERIAL format with CLIFFHANGER endings.

The Stalking Dead
Book 3
Q: WHAT’S WORSE THAN LOSING YOUR FAKE BOYFRIEND MINUTES AFTER YOUR FIRST REAL KISS?

A: NOTHING. BUT KILLER ZOMBIES COME CLOSE…

Megan has proved that she’s a force to reckoned with and a powerful up-and-coming Settler, but the Elders still refuse to take her theories seriously. Not even when she catches her nemesis, Monica, practically red-handed summoning a black-magically raised corpse.

Instead, the Elders decide Monica needs protection and reassign Ethan, Megan’s Ethan, to Monicster detail!

But soon Megan learns there are indeed worse things than losing your fake boyfriend moments after your first real kiss. There is being all alone in the dark when the person who’s trying to kill you takes their efforts to the next level.

Alert: THE STALKING DEAD was previously published as part of the full-length novel YOU ARE SO UNDEAD TO ME in 2009. It has been extensively revised for this second edition told in SERIAL format with CLIFFHANGER endings.

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Apocalypse Nowish
Book 8
Q: When’s the best time to warn The Powers That Be of an impending zombie apocalypse?

A: Before you’re kidnapped by killer cheerleaders!

The only thing scarier than a van full of cheerleaders is a van full of black magic working cheerleaders determined to bring about the end times.

Megan is about to be sacrificed to a freaky zombie in a dark rite and the only one who can save her is the boy she pushed away.

Can she summon the magical mojo to be her own Zombie Slayer in Shining Armor? Or will an evil blast from the past put an end to her before the Happily Ever After?

Alert: APOCALYPSE NOWISH was previously published as part of the full-length novel UNDEAD MUCH? in 2010. It has been extensively revised for this second edition told in SERIAL format.
Blood on the Bayou
Stacey Jay
The second book in a new urban fantasy series featuring mosquito-sized fairies with poisonous bites that drive humans insane.
Tell Me to Run
Book 4
From the moment we met, Nicholas Crawford has been an enigma. 

He’s a man with an unknown past and a mysterious future. 

He’s a criminal, a liar, a mastermind and the love of my life. 

I became a criminal for him. 

I rescued him and now it’s his turn to do something for me. 

When I discover that everything I believed about my family is a lie, I need his help to uncover the truth. 


Who am I ? 

Where do I come from? 

Why is there so much deceit? 

I’m in a dark place and I’m all alone and he is the only person who can pull me out of it. 

He is my only hope, what happens if that’s not enough?


Dive into the decadent and delicious 4th book of the new and addictive Tell Me series by bestselling author Charlotte Byrd.

 

_____________________________________________


What readers are saying about Charlotte Byrd:


"Extremely captivating, sexy, steamy, intriguing, and intense!” ★★★★★


"Addictive and impossible to put down.” ★★★★★


“I can’t get enough of the turmoil, lust, love, drama and secrets!” ★★★★★


“Fast-paced romantic suspense filled twists and turns, danger, betrayal and so much more.” ★★★★★


“Decadent, delicious, & dangerously addictive!” ★★★★★ 

_____________________________________________


*Beware of spoilers in the reviews below that are without spoiler alerts.*

Dead on the Delta
Stacey Jay
Once upon a time, fairies were the stuff of bedtime stories and sweet dreams. Then came the mutations, and the dre-ams became nightmares. Mosquito-size fairies now indulge their taste for human blood—and for most humans, a fairy bite means insanity or death. Luckily, Annabelle Lee isn’t most humans. The hard-drinking, smart-mouthed, bicycle-riding redhead is immune to fairy venom, and able to do the dirty work most humans can’t. Including helping law enforcement— and Cane Cooper, the bayou’s sexiest detective—collect evidence when a body is discovered outside the fairy-proof barricades of her Louisiana town.

But Annabelle isn’t equipped to deal with the murder of a sixyear- old girl or a former lover-turned-FBI snob taking an interest in the case. Suddenly her already bumpy relationship with Cane turns even rockier, and even the most trust-worthy friends become suspects. Annabelle’s life is imploding: between relationship drama, a heartbreaking murder investigation, Breeze-crazed drug runners, and a few too many rum and Cokes, Annabelle is a woman on the run—from her past, toward her future, and into the arms of a darkness waiting just for her. . . .
Tell Me to Stop
Book 1
I owe him a debt. The kind money can’t repay.


He wants something else: me, for one year.

But I don’t even know who he is…


365 days and nights doing everything he wants…except that.


“I’m not going to sleep with you,” I say categorically.


He laughs.


“I’m going to make you a promise,” his eyes challenge mine. “Before our time is up, you’ll beg me for it.”


_____________________________________________


What readers are saying about Charlotte Byrd:


"Extremely captivating, sexy, steamy, intriguing, and intense!” ★★★★★


"Addictive and impossible to put down.” ★★★★★


“I can’t get enough of the turmoil, lust, love, drama and secrets!” ★★★★★


“Fast-paced romantic suspense filled twists and turns, danger, betrayal and so much more.” ★★★★★


“Decadent, delicious, & dangerously addictive!” ★★★★★ 

_____________________________________________


*Beware of spoilers in the reviews below that are without spoiler alerts.*


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