Deep Black

Lulu Press, Inc
13

When retired accountant, detective fiction devotee and lifelong philanderer, Philip Ramsbottom, set up a private investigation agency, he had thought it wise to accept only straightforward tasks – after all, his entire experience of detective work had been gained from reading crime novels. Philip had thus not expected his very first commission to draw him into the murky world of espionage. Elite special agents were required to save the British and NATO nuclear submarine fleets. Such a dangerous assignment, however, would have been more suitably allocated to people with relevant experience – in preference to Philip and his former lover, Rebecca Carter. The quest for the Sirens’ Song Configuration would have been much better pursued by the ultra-secret group of super-spies known as Deep Black. In another affectionate tribute to many classic storylines, Swan Morrison once again incorporates comedy, crime, espionage, romance, the paranormal and more into a complex and action packed adventure thriller.
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4.1
13 total
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Additional Information

Publisher
Lulu Press, Inc
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Published on
Sep 5, 2015
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Pages
172
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ISBN
9781326402099
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Language
English
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Genres
Humor / General
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Content Protection
This content is DRM protected.
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Read Aloud
Available on Android devices
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If you’ve had the distinct privilege of spending any amount of time with me, you know by now that I’m an opinionated guy. What’s more, you’ve realized that I often present my opinions as fact. What better way to cement these opinions as such than to remove them from the malleable medium of a blog and print them indelibly in this digital volume? If you read it in an ebook, you know it’s true. It is my intent that this book reads as a collection of short stories. Creative (non)fiction, as the Library Of Congress might call it. As a result, you’ll find references to events in the past interspersed with rants and tangents (rantgents) about things that I currently hate, or at least somewhat convincingly pretend to hate. You might even find a few chapters about things I don’t hate. I have adapted a couple of the chapters in this book from my blog, Rhetorock, which you can and will follow at jondavidsonmusic.blogspot.com. However, I’ve removed any sense of chronological order. My mind rarely sits still. Metaphorically. Physically, it’s typically firmly lodged inside my skull. Right now, I’m simultaneously thinking about bath salts, kidney beans, Levi’s 510s, Jeremiah, Obamacare, Keane, and why I put my underwear on inside out again. Rather than attempt to tame the meandering beast that is my stream of consciousness, I’ve written in a way that reflects my usual thought processes. You’re welcome. Opinions represented in this book are solely mine, although I suppose that probably goes without saying. Some opinions have changed since I’ve written certain chapters. I’ve completely fabricated some opinions for the sake of discussion and entertainment, and to try to make others look stupid. However, some of the opinions I’ve expressed are completely serious. Feel free to disagree with me on anything and everything. Use your judgment, and take everything I’ve penned with a grain of salt. Better yet, with a massive salt lick. Make sure it’s iodized salt, though. Goiters are really not all that cool. If you’re offended by anything that I’ve written, I sincerely apologize. You have taken me way too seriously. Write me an angry letter, and then take that letter and light it on fire. It is my hope that this book makes you laugh, cry, and ponder. Simultaneously, you big thoughtful blubbering mess. Life is short, and we’re not given a lot of time on this earth. I hope you enjoy the time you spend with this book.
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER

“An inspiring story that manages to be painful, honest, shocking, bawdy and hilarious.” —The New York Times Book Review

From stand-up comedian, actress, and breakout star of Girls Trip, Tiffany Haddish, comes The Last Black Unicorn, a sidesplitting, hysterical, edgy, and unflinching collection of (extremely) personal essays, as fearless as the author herself.

Growing up in one of the poorest neighborhoods of South Central Los Angeles, Tiffany learned to survive by making people laugh. If she could do that, then her classmates would let her copy their homework, the other foster kids she lived with wouldn’t beat her up, and she might even get a boyfriend. Or at least she could make enough money—as the paid school mascot and in-demand Bar Mitzvah hype woman—to get her hair and nails done, so then she might get a boyfriend.

None of that worked (and she’s still single), but it allowed Tiffany to imagine a place for herself where she could do something she loved for a living: comedy.

Tiffany can’t avoid being funny—it’s just who she is, whether she’s plotting shocking, jaw-dropping revenge on an ex-boyfriend or learning how to handle her newfound fame despite still having a broke person’s mind-set. Finally poised to become a household name, she recounts with heart and humor how she came from nothing and nowhere to achieve her dreams by owning, sharing, and using her pain to heal others.

By turns hilarious, filthy, and brutally honest, The Last Black Unicorn shows the world who Tiffany Haddish really is—humble, grateful, down-to-earth, and funny as hell. And now, she’s ready to inspire others through the power of laughter.
New York Times bestselling author, superstar comedian, and Hollywood box office star Kevin Hart turns his immense talent to the written word by writing some words. Some of those words include: the, a, for, above, and even even. Put them together and you have a “hilarious but also heartfelt” (Elle) memoir on survival, success, and the importance of believing in yourself.

The question you’re probably asking yourself right now is: What does Kevin Hart have that a book also has?

According to the three people who have seen Kevin Hart and a book in the same room, the answer is clear:

A book is compact. Kevin Hart is compact.

A book has a spine that holds it together. Kevin Hart has a spine that holds him together.

A book has a beginning. Kevin Hart’s life uniquely qualifies him to write this book by also having a beginning.

It begins in North Philadelphia. He was born an accident, unwanted by his parents. His father was a drug addict who was in and out of jail. His brother was a crack dealer and petty thief. And his mother was overwhelmingly strict, beating him with belts, frying pans, and his own toys.

The odds, in short, were stacked against our young hero. But Kevin Hart, like Ernest Hemingway, J.K. Rowling, and Chocolate Droppa before him, was able to defy the odds and turn it around. In his literary debut, he takes us on a journey through what his life was, what it is today, and how he’s overcome each challenge to become the man he is today.

And that man happens to be the biggest comedian in the world, with tours that sell out football stadiums and films that have collectively grossed over $3.5 billion.

He achieved this not just through hard work, determination, and talent. “Hart is an incredibly magnetic storyteller, on the page as he is onstage, and that’s what shines through [in this] genial, entertaining guide to a life in comedy” (Kirkus Reviews).
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