I Did it in the Dark: My Uncensored Journey Through Weight Loss, Ozempic, Surgery & The Self-Love I Found on the Other Side
About this ebook
I lost 145 pounds.
I went from 315 to 170.
And I did it in private—through two bariatric surgeries, an Ozempic prescription, and a mental health journey that nearly broke me.
This is the truth about weight loss that no one says out loud.
I Did It in the Dark is an uncensored memoir of what it actually takes to lose weight when your body is working against you—when the issue isn’t discipline, but biology, shame, and years of being misunderstood.
Inside, I tell the full story:
The bulimia I never told anyone about
The appetite suppressants I didn’t fully disclose
The undiagnosed insulin resistance that shaped my body for years
The moment Ozempic finally quieted the food noise for the first time in fifteen years
The reality of sleeve surgery, revision, and recovery—while still showing up to lead a school
This is not a diet book.
This is what happens behind the transformation.
It’s also the story of everything that runs underneath weight loss:
A faith community that said pray when the answer was treatment
A relationship that wanted the result but not the woman
A medical system that missed what was happening in my body
And the therapy room that finally asked the right questions
I became a school principal while my body was at war with me—and no one at work knew.
I did it in the dark.
If you are taking Ozempic, considering it, or hiding your weight loss journey—this book is for you.
If you’ve been told your weight is a willpower problem—this book is for you.
If you’ve ever felt ashamed of needing help—this book is for you.
The tools exist.
The truth is harder.
And the shame was never yours to carry.
Do it in the dark if you have to.
Just don’t stop.
Discover more
About the author
Gemini Carrington is the pen name of F. T. Smith — educator, author, and lifelong believer that the right story, told honestly, can change a woman's life.
A school principal in the Washington, D.C. metro area, she holds a Master's degree in Curriculum and Instruction and a Harvard certification in School Management and Leadership. She has spent her career inside the buildings, the hallways, and the hard conversations that Worthy of the Room was built from. She does not write from theory. She writes from the doorways she has actually stood in.
As a little girl, she dreamed of contributing something to the written world — of adding her voice to the long conversation that books have always been. That dream never left. It simply waited for the right season.
Her mission is straightforward and non-negotiable: to help women — of every age, background, and season of life — find the language for what they have been living. To name the rooms that were not built for them. To name the grief that has no ceremony. To name the calling that has not yet been given permission to speak at full volume.
She loves the arts, the theatre, and the particular magic of a story that makes a room go quiet before it makes it come alive.
She publishes under both F. T. Smith and Gemini Carrington. Whatever name is on the cover, the reader will find the same thing inside: lived experience, honest faith, and a deep, unshakeable belief that God is not finished with any of us.
Worthy of the Room is one of many books she intends to leave in the world.
