New Families, Old Scripts: A Guide to the Language of Trauma and Attachment in Adoptive Families

Jessica Kingsley Publishers
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Most adopted children and their families will, sooner or later, encounter the challenges of dealing with unresolved attachment issues or early traumatic experiences.

New Families, Old Scripts is an accessible introduction to understanding these challenges and helping children and their families to develop a shared language and understanding of one another. Steeped in the experience of the authors, the book offers a wealth of practical guidance and intervention in a no-nonsense style that will be readily understandable to both families and the professionals who work with them. Case examples bring the issues to life, while sample letters addressed to the parent offer sensitive, jargon-free advice on the issues they are likely to encounter - whether it be dealing with anger and aggression, understanding sibling issues or how to react to sexualised behaviour. The authors also explain some of the theoretical background to trauma to encourage a better understanding of the relationship between trauma, attachment and development.

The accessible combination of theoretical approaches and practical advice makes New Families, Old Scripts an ideal resource for social workers and adoptive or foster parents.

Family Futures Consortium provides services for parents and professionals working with adopted and fostered children, including training and consultation for statutory and voluntary agencies nationwide. In their therapeutic work with families, they have evolved a unique intensive, multi-disciplinary approach to supporting children with attachment and trauma-related difficulties.

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About the author

Caroline Archer is an adoptive parent, an independent consultant in post-adoption support and a therapeutic parent mentor. She is also the bestselling author of Reparenting the Child who Hurts: A Guide to Healing Developmental Trauma and Attachments
, First Steps in Parenting a Child who Hurts: Tiddlers and Toddlers 2nd Edition, and Next Steps in Parenting a Child who Hurts: Tykes and Teens (with Christine Gordon). Christine Gordon is an adoptive parent with many years' experience of working with adoptive and foster families. She was a co-founder of Family Futures Consortium, London. Alongside her 'hands on' supportive role to parents, she is active in training and promoting the professional role of parent mentor as an integral part of the therapeutic team.

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Additional Information

Publisher
Jessica Kingsley Publishers
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Published on
Feb 8, 2006
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Pages
256
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ISBN
9781846424823
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Language
English
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Genres
Family & Relationships / Adoption & Fostering
Psychology / Developmental / Child
Social Science / Children's Studies
Social Science / Social Work
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Content Protection
This content is DRM protected.
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Available on Android devices
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Eligible for Family Library

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Do I have what it takes to be a successful adoptive parent?
Does my child consider me a successful parent?
Will I ever hear my rebellious teen say, “I love you”?
What tools do I need to succeed?

In her groundbreaking first book, Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew, Sherrie Eldridge gave voice to the very real concerns of adopted children, whose unique perspectives offered unprecedented insight. In this all-new companion volume, Eldridge goes beyond those insights and shifts her focus to parents, offering them much-needed encouragement and hope.

Speaking from her own experience as an adoptee and an expert in the field of adoption, Eldridge shares proven strategies and the moving narratives of nearly one hundred adoptive families, helping parents gain a deeper understanding of what is normal, both for their children and themselves. By first strengthening yourself as a parent, you’ll be able to truly listen to your child, and to connect with him on every level, by opening the channels of communication and keeping them open forever. Then you and your child can grow closer through the practical exercises at the end of every chapter.

Discover how to
• be confident that your role in your child’s life is vital and irreplaceable
• pass on the legacy of healthy self-care by assessing and regulating your stress
• communicate unconditional love to your child
• talk candidly with your child about her adoption and her birth family
• teach your family how to respond positively to insensitive remarks about adoption
• connect with other adoptive families–and build a support network
• plus learn to become a “warrior” parent…settle the “real parent” question…cope with emotional triggers–what to do when you “lose it” . . . celebrate the miracle of your family…and much more
Written by an experienced adoptive parent, this clear, sensitive and practical handbook is designed to encourage and support adoptive and long-term foster parents, their children and adolescents. An adopted child may well have suffered abuse, neglect or inconsistent parenting in the past; he or she will certainly have experienced painful separations and losses. These early traumatic experiences, often expressed in emotional and behavioural problems within the family, can conceal a broad range of subtle alterations to the brain and nervous system of the developing child. They may become increasingly problematic as the youngster approaches the developmental challenges of adolescence.

Drawing on both firsthand experience and some of the latest medical research, Caroline Archer presents strategies to help parents deal with their youngsters' troubling behaviour and to make them feel more comfortable, in what seems to them a hostile world.

Archer sets out to provide adoptive and foster parents with an understanding of the complex range of difficulties with which their children may struggle as a result of their early experience of adversity. By exploring, in very simple ways, the effects of adverse experiences on the child's built-in biological response systems, she assists parents to make sense of the frequently perplexing behaviours of the hurt child within their family. Common situations which she specifically addresses include: sleep problems; anger, aggression and violence; lying and stealing; staying out late and running away; addictive behaviours and self harm; impulsiveness and risk-taking; sex; suicide and compulsive eating disorders.

Following on from First Steps in Parenting the Child Who Hurts: Tiddlers and Toddlers (2nd edition), Next Steps will be an invaluable resource for adoptive and foster parents seeking to support their child through the later stages of childhood and adolescence. This book will also be an essential practical guide for professionals working with families and eager to gain a thorough understanding of the on-going developmental and relationship difficulties of adopted children.

`This excellent book looks at the attachment and development of very young children in the fostering and adoption situation. It deals sensitively and practically with the young child's "hurts" to help adopters and foster carers understand and cope with the many traumas they may experience in integrating a young child into their family. Caroline Archer is a real adoptive parent speaking from experience so this book provides good, practical advice and encouragement for the mothering figure when things are not following the normal attachment and development patterns... This highly readable book is highly recommended for everyone fostering or adopting very young children.'

- Adoption and Fostering

`Written by an adoptive parent [this book aims] to give practical advice and parenting tips to other adoptive and long-term foster parents. The author's basic premise is that all children who have been adopted or placed in long-term care have undergone some form of psychological hurt. She argues that while some children will be more resilient to this hurt than others, many children will need their hurt to be acknowledged by their parents/carers, and be allowed to grieve for their losses in order to move forward to a life of greater well-being and fulfilment. [The book begins] by exploring such issues as bringing a child home, child development and what to do when things "don't seem quite right". Other issues covered are the effects of trauma on a child, and how to handle specific difficulties that may arise with an adopted child. [It is] written in a clear easy-to-read format, and contain[s] a list of references for further reading.'

- Family Matters

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