Are you tired of peace and love meditation apps?

Welcome to Third Eye Timer, the world's first Anti-Guru App. We gamified enlightenment because you are only doing it for the spiritual ego anyway.

WHY THIS APP IS DIFFERENT:

THE SCREAM JAR (Viral Hit) Stressed? Do not breathe through it. SCREAM through it. Use your phone's microphone to scream into our virtual jar until it SHATTERS. Watch the glass break as you release your rage. Then share the shattered remains. Cheaper than therapy, louder than yoga.

100 LEVELS OF TRUTH Most apps give you affirmations. We give you Brutal Truths.

Rank 100 (The Sleeper): You are asleep.
Rank 50 (Storm Centre): Your values are just habits.
Rank 1 (The Nobody): Dissolve into the void. Unlock all 100 Truth Punches—philosophical slaps in the face that will dismantle your illusions piece by piece.
ACCUMULATE SPIRITUAL EGO Start as a wireframe Sleeper. Meditate to gain Spiritual Ego points. As you level up, watch your avatar physically transform:

Level 20: Gain a physical body.
Level 40: Start Levitating.
Level 60: Grow a glowing Aura.
Level 80: DISSOLVE INTO PURE LIGHT.
COSMIC PETS Lonely on your path to the void? Hatch a Cosmic Pet. Feed it Truths and watch it evolve from a simple Egg into a Wisp and finally a Guardian. Keep its mood high by meditating (or bribing it).

DAILY QUESTS & VIBE CHECKS

Complete Vibe Checks for instant Karma.
Watch ads (ironically) to gain material attachments.
Grind for enlightenment like the gamer you are.
FEATURES:

Idle Gameplay: Earn Spiritual Ego even when you aren't meditating.
Haptic Feedback: Feel the Truths vibrate in your hand.
Dark Mode UI: Sleek, cosmic aesthetics. No beige. No bamboo sounds.
Zero fake gurus.
Download Third Eye Timer now. Stop taking your spirituality so seriously. It is time to wake up.