You can take the job you have—and improve it!
You can take any situation—and make it work for you!
Dale Carnegie’s rock-solid, time-tested advice has carried countless people up the ladder of success in their business and personal lives. One of the most groundbreaking and timeless bestsellers of all time, How to Win Friends & Influence People will teach you:
-Six ways to make people like you
-Twelve ways to win people to your way of thinking
-Nine ways to change people without arousing resentment
And much more! Achieve your maximum potential—a must-read for the twenty-first century with more than 15 million copies sold!
"The lost art of verbal communication may be revitalized by Leil Lowndes." -- Harvey McKay, author of “How to Swim with the Sharks Without Being Eaten Alive”
What is that magic quality makes some people instantly loved and respected? Everyone wants to be their friend (or, if single, their lover!) In business, they rise swiftly to the top of the corporate ladder. What is their "Midas touch?"
What it boils down to is a more skillful way of dealing with people.
The author has spent her career teaching people how to communicate for success. In her book How to Talk to Anyone (Contemporary Books, October 2003) Lowndes offers 92 easy and effective sure-fire success techniques-- she takes the reader from first meeting all the way up to sophisticated techniques used by the big winners in life. In this information-packed book you’ll find:9 ways to make a dynamite first impression 14 ways to master small talk, "big talk," and body language 14 ways to walk and talk like a VIP or celebrity 6 ways to sound like an insider in any crowd 7 ways to establish deep subliminal rapport with anyone 9 ways to feed someone's ego (and know when NOT to!) 11 ways to make your phone a powerful communications tool 15 ways to work a party like a politician works a room 7 ways to talk with tigers and not get eaten alive
In her trademark entertaining and straight-shooting style, Leil gives the techniques catchy names so you'll remember them when you really need them, including: "Rubberneck the Room," "Be a Copyclass," "Come Hither Hands," “Bare Their Hot Button,” “The Great Scorecard in the Sky," and "Play the Tombstone Game,” for big success in your social life, romance, and business.
How to Talk to Anyone, which is an update of her popular book, Talking the Winner's Way (see the 5-star reviews of the latter) is based on solid research about techniques that work!
By the way, don't confuse How to Talk to Anyone with one of Leil's previous books, How to Talk to Anybody About Anything. This one is completely different!
With Dale Carnegie's timeless advice in hand, more than six million people have learned how to eliminate debilitating fear and worry from their lives and to embrace a worry-free future. In this classic work, How to Stop Worrying and Start Living, Carnegie offers a set of practical formulas that you can put to work today. It is a book packed with lessons that will last a lifetime and make that lifetime happier!
DISCOVER HOW TO:
Eliminate fifty percent of business worries immediately
Reduce financial worries
Avoid fatigue -- and keep looking young
Add one hour a day to your waking life
Find yourself and be yourself -- remember there is no one else on earth like you!
Fascinating to read and easy to apply, How to Stop Worrying and Start Living deals with fundamental emotions and life-changing ideas. There's no need to live with worry and anxiety that keep you from enjoying a full, active life!
In this groundbreaking book, psychiatrist and neuroscientist Amir Levine and psychologist Rachel S. F. Heller reveal how an understanding of attachment theory-the most advanced relationship science in existence today-can help us find and sustain love. Attachment theory forms the basis for many bestselling books on the parent/child relationship, but there has yet to be an accessible guide to what this fascinating science has to tell us about adult romantic relationships-until now.
Attachment theory owes its inception to British psychologist and psychoanalyst John Bowlby, who in the 1950s examined the tremendous impact that our early relationships with our parents or caregivers has on the people we become. Also central to attachment theory is the discovery that our need to be in a close relationship with one or more individuals is embedded in our genes.
In Attached, Levine and Heller trace how these evolutionary influences continue to shape who we are in our relationships today. According to attachment theory, every person behaves in relationships in one of three distinct ways:
*ANXIOUS people are often preoccupied with their relationships and tend to worry about their partner's ability to love them back.
*AVOIDANT people equate intimacy with a loss of independence and constantly try to minimize closeness.
*SECURE people feel comfortable with intimacy and are usually warm and loving.
Attached guides readers in determining what attachment style they and their mate (or potential mates) follow. It also offers readers a wealth of advice on how to navigate their relationships more wisely given their attachment style and that of their partner. An insightful look at the science behind love, Attached offers readers a road map for building stronger, more fulfilling connections.
The only self-help book you’ll ever need, from a psychiatrist and his comedy writer daughter, who will help you put aside your unrealistic wishes, stop trying to change things you can’t change, and do the best with what you can control—the first steps to managing all of life’s impossible problems.
Here is the cut-to-the-chase therapy session you’ve been looking for!
Need to stop screwing up? Want to become a more positive person?
Do you work with an ass? Think you can rescue an addicted person?
Looking for closure after abuse? Have you realized that your parent is an asshole?
Feel compelled to clear your name? Hope to salvage a lost love?
Want to get a lover to commit? Plagued by a bully?
Afraid of ruining your kid? Ready to vent your anger?
In this brilliantly sensible and funny book, a Harvard-educated shrink and his comedy-writing daughter reveal that the real f-words in life are “feelings” and “fairness.” While most self-help books are about your feelings and fulfilling your wildest dreams, F*ck Feelings will show you how to find a new kind of freedom by getting your head out of your ass and yourself onto the right path toward realistic goals and feasible results. F*ck Feelings is the last self-help book you will ever need!
Is it your lying, cheating ex-husband?
Your sadistic high school gym teacher?
Your boss who loves to humiliate people in meetings?
The colleague who stole your idea and passed it off as her own?
In the pages of The Sociopath Next Door, you will realize that your ex was not just misunderstood. He’s a sociopath. And your boss, teacher, and colleague? They may be sociopaths too.
We are accustomed to think of sociopaths as violent criminals, but in The Sociopath Next Door, Harvard psychologist Martha Stout reveals that a shocking 4 percent of ordinary people—one in twenty-five—has an often undetected mental disorder, the chief symptom of which is that that person possesses no conscience. He or she has no ability whatsoever to feel shame, guilt, or remorse. One in twenty-five everyday Americans, therefore, is secretly a sociopath. They could be your colleague, your neighbor, even family. And they can do literally anything at all and feel absolutely no guilt.
How do we recognize the remorseless? One of their chief characteristics is a kind of glow or charisma that makes sociopaths more charming or interesting than the other people around them. They’re more spontaneous, more intense, more complex, or even sexier than everyone else, making them tricky to identify and leaving us easily seduced. Fundamentally, sociopaths are different because they cannot love. Sociopaths learn early on to show sham emotion, but underneath they are indifferent to others’ suffering. They live to dominate and thrill to win.
The fact is, we all almost certainly know at least one or more sociopaths already. Part of the urgency in reading The Sociopath Next Door is the moment when we suddenly recognize that someone we know—someone we worked for, or were involved with, or voted for—is a sociopath. But what do we do with that knowledge? To arm us against the sociopath, Dr. Stout teaches us to question authority, suspect flattery, and beware the pity play. Above all, she writes, when a sociopath is beckoning, do not join the game.
It is the ruthless versus the rest of us, and The Sociopath Next Door will show you how to recognize and defeat the devil you know.
'It's about the terror, isn't it?'
'The terror of what?' I said.
'The terror of being found out.'
For the past three years, Jon Ronson has travelled the world meeting recipients of high-profile public shamings. The shamed are people like us - people who, say, made a joke on social media that came out badly, or made a mistake at work. Once their transgression is revealed, collective outrage circles with the force of a hurricane and the next thing they know they're being torn apart by an angry mob, jeered at, demonized, sometimes even fired from their job.
A great renaissance of public shaming is sweeping our land. Justice has been democratized. The silent majority are getting a voice. But what are we doing with our voice? We are mercilessly finding people's faults. We are defining the boundaries of normality by ruining the lives of those outside it. We are using shame as a form of social control.
Simultaneously powerful and hilarious in the way only Jon Ronson can be, So You've Been Publicly Shamed is a deeply honest book about modern life, full of eye-opening truths about the escalating war on human flaws - and the very scary part we all play in it.
From the Hardcover edition.
It doesn't matter if you've already broken up and things seem like a lost cause. When it hurts as bad as I'm guessing it's hurting you right now, know that the pain you're feeling is your heart telling you that what you had was special and you don't want to lose it. But guess what:if you give up now or make all the wrong choices while trying to save it, you will lose your ex forever.
This book has been written to help make sure that doesn't happen to you.
On his journey from AFC (average frustrated chump) to PUA (pick-up artist) to PUG (pick-up guru), Strauss not only shares scores of original seduction techniques but also has unforgettable encounters with the likes of Tom Cruise, Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, Heidi Fleiss, and Courtney Love. And then things really start to get strange—and passions lead to betrayals lead to violence. The Game is the story of one man's transformation from frog to prince to prisoner in the most unforgettable book of this generation.
Dale Carnegie’s time-tested advice has carried millions upon millions of readers for more than seventy-five years up the ladder of success in their business and personal lives. Now the first and best book of its kind has been rebooted to tame the complexities of modern times and will teach you how to communicate with diplomacy and tact, capitalize on a solid network, make people like you, project your message widely and clearly, be a more effective leader, increase your ability to get things done, and optimize the power of digital tools.
Dale Carnegie’s commonsense approach to communicating has endured for a century, touching millions and millions of readers. The only diploma that hangs in Warren Buffett’s office is his certificate from Dale Carnegie Training. Lee Iacocca credits Carnegie for giving him the courage to speak in public. Dilbert creator Scott Adams called Carnegie’s teachings “life-changing.” To demonstrate the lasting relevancy of his tools, Dale Carnegie & Associates, Inc., has reimagined his prescriptions and his advice for our difficult digital age. We may communicate today with different tools and with greater speed, but Carnegie’s advice on how to communicate, lead, and work efficiently remains priceless across the ages.
In his book, Get the Guy, Matthew Hussey—relationship expert, matchmaker, and star of the reality show Ready for Love—reveals the secrets of the male mind and the fundamentals of dating and mating for a proven, revolutionary approach to help women to find lasting love.
Matthew Hussey has coached thousands of high-powered CEOs, showing them how to develop confidence and build relationships that translate into professional success. Many of Matthew’s male clients pressed him for advice on how to apply his winning strategies not to just get the job, but how to get the girl. As his reputation grew, Hussey was approached by more and more women, eager to hear what he had learned about the male perspective on love and romance.
From landing a first date to establishing emotional intimacy, playful flirtation to red-hot bedroom tips, Matthew’s insightfulness, irreverence, and warmth makes Get the Guy: Learn Secrets of the Male Mind to Find the Man You Want and the Love You Deserve a one-of-a-kind relationship guide and the handbook for every woman who wants to get the guy she’s been waiting for.
It's a fact. Every woman needs game. Take Oprah, Jada Pinkett-Smith, and Beyoncé Knowles. All three of these women have the one intangible quality that every mack, male or female, must possess: they all have game. In other words, they have intelligence, hustle, and common sense that they apply to every aspect of their lives -- especially in their relationships.
Play or Be Played is an instruction manual for women who are tired of being played by men and who want to be players themselves. Though women may not want to play games, the truth is men often do. So women who hope to win in the game of love must first learn the rules. Bestselling author and true mack, Tariq "K-Flex" Nasheed shares:
ways to spot a scrub
what it takes to get with a baller
why men cheat
how men really judge women
the top three mistakes women make in relationships
Street-smart and straightforward, Play or Be Played will help you get with a king without being a hoochie, groupie, or a chickenhead.
Will the trust ever come back?
How can things be good between us again?
Whether broken trust is due to daily dishonesties, a monumental betrayal, or even a history of hurts from the past, it can put a relationship at risk. This is the first book to show you exactly what to do to restore trust in your relationship, regardless of how it was damaged.
In this complete guide, couples therapist Mira Kirshenbaum will also help you understand the stages by which trust strengthens when the rebuilding process is allowed to take place. And you will learn how the two of you can avoid the mistakes that prevent healing and discover how to feel secure with each other again.
For business leaders and public figures in any arena, The Speed of Trust offers an unprecedented and eminently practical look at exactly how trust functions in our every transaction and relationship—from the most personal to the broadest, most indirect interaction—and how to establish trust immediately so that you and your organization can forego the time–killing, bureaucratic check–and–balance processes so often deployed in lieu of actual trust.
Relationship expert Dr. Steven Stosny has been featured on national media for the revolutionary techniques he uses in his Compassion-Power and Boot Camp programs, which help men rewire their resentment and anger, stop using emotionally abusive language and behavior, and compassionately recommit to their marriages and families.
Now, in You Don't Have to Take It Anymore, Dr. Stosny puts his effective, highly sought-after program into print, making it widely available for the first time for women who want to stop walking on eggshells. Drawing on his seventeen years of experience treating thousands of clients, Dr. Stosny explains the many different forms a verbally and emotionally abusive relationship can take. He explains how to identify abuse and why it's important to take action to change the relationship -- for not only is verbal and emotional abuse monumentally destructive to both the adults in the relationship, it also hurts their children. Dr. Stosny shows women and men how to apply his methods at home, shows women how to get their men to change, and demonstrates how they can know if change is permanent. Additionally, Dr. Stosny's program helps women recover from the pain and abuse by practicing self-healing skills so that they can reclaim their natural sense of competence and confidence. Using language that is more compassionate and accessible than in any other book on relationship abuse -- and different tactics from most other therapies and therapists -- You Don't Have to Take It Anymore presents a practical program that both women and men can use to stop verbal and emotional abuse.
Conversational hypnosis is your gateway to becoming a better communicator, with better persuasive power and the ability to influence. Linguistic principles are used to improve the power of your speech, making people pay attention and listen. Not only will they listen, but you will also find that they are agreeable to what you are suggesting. Make the power of suggestion work for you and learn how to get people to do what you want through influence and persuasion.
This book will walk you through how to establish rapport and then how to get people to do what you want, without realizing you are influencing them in any way
Getting to Yes has helped millions of people learn a better way to negotiate. One of the primary business texts of the modern era, it is based on the work of the Harvard Negotiation Project, a group that deals with all levels of negotiation and conflict resolution.
Getting to Yes offers a proven, step-by-step strategy for coming to mutually acceptable agreements in every sort of conflict. Thoroughly updated and revised, it offers readers a straight- forward, universally applicable method for negotiating personal and professional disputes without getting angry-or getting taken.
IN REAL LIFE: Love, Lies & Identity in the Digital Age
As the host of the wildly popular TV series Catfish which investigates online relationships to determine whether they are based on truth or fiction (spoiler: it's almost always fiction).
Nev has become the Dr. Drew of online relationships. His clout in this area springs from his own experience with a deceptive online romance, about which he made a critically acclaimed 2010 documentary (also called Catfish). In that film Nev coined the term "catfish" to refer to someone who creates a false online persona to reel someone into a romantic relationship. The meme spread rapidly.
Now Nev brings his expertise to the page, sharing insider secrets about:
-what motivates catfish
-why people fall for catfish
-how you can avoid being deceived
-rules for dating -- both online and off
-how to connect authentically with others over the internet
-how to turn an online relationship into a real-life relationship
...and much, much more.
Peppered throughout with Nev's personal stories, this book delves deeply into the complexities of online identity. Nev shows us how our digital lives are affecting our real lives, and provides essential advice about how we should all be living and loving in the era of social media.
An estimated 1.5 million American women have narcissistic personality disorder, which makes them so insecure and overbearing, insensitive and domineering that they can psychologically damage their daughters for life. Daughters of narcissistic mothers learn that maternal love is not unconditional, and that it is given only when they behave in accordance with their mothers' often unreasonable expectations and whims. As adults, these daughters consequently have difficulty overcoming their insecurities and feelings of inadequacy, disappointment, sadness, and emotional emptiness. They may also have a terrible fear of abandonment that leads them to form unhealthy love relationships, as well as a tendency to perfectionism and unrelenting self-criticism, or to self-sabotage and frustration.
Herself the recovering daughter of a narcissistic mother, Dr. McBride includes her personal struggle, which adds a profound level of authority to her work, along with the perspectives of the hundreds of suffering daughters she's interviewed over the years. Their stories of how maternal abuse has manifested in their lives -- as well as how they have successfully overcome its effects -- show you that you're not alone and that you can take back your life and have the control you want.
Dr. McBride's step-by-step program will enable you to:
(1) Recognize your own experience with maternal narcissism and its effects on all aspects of your life
(2) Discover how you have internalized verbal and nonverbal messages from your mother and how these have translated into a strong desire to overachieve or a tendency to self-sabotage
(3) Construct a step-by-step program to reclaim your life and enhance your sense of self, a process that includes creating a psychological separation from your mother and breaking the legacy of abuse. You will also learn how not to repeat your mother's mistakes with your own daughter.
Warm and sympathetic, filled with the examples of women who have established healthy boundaries with their hurtful mothers, Will I Ever Be Good Enough? encourages and inspires you as it aids your recovery.
How to Talk to the Ladies: Make a Connection and Start Dating! will help you overcome any problems you may have in talking to women and start dating better. Providing tips on how to start conversations with women as well as how to ask them out, this guide is a must for any man who needs help with the opposite sex.
This complete summary of the ideas from Dale Carnegie's book "How to Win Friends and Influence People" shows that no matter your occupation, goals, ambitions or your position in a company, dealing with people is your biggest challenge. Therefore, if you learn how to do so effectively you will reap the rewards in terms of profitability, productivity and morale. This summary highlights how to work with rather than against people, and how to be successful in your personal and professional life.
Added-value of this summary:
• Save time
• Understand the key concepts
• Improve your social and communication skills
To learn more, read "How to Win Friends and Influence People" and discover how to motivate people and how to communicate efficiently.
Disarming the Narcissist, Second Edition, will show you how to move past the narcissist's defenses using compassionate, empathetic communication. You'll learn how narcissists view the world, how to navigate their coping styles, and why, oftentimes, it's sad and lonely being a narcissist. By learning to anticipate and avoid certain hot-button issues, you'll be able to relate to narcissists without triggering aggression. By validating some common narcissistic concerns, you'll also find out how to be heard in conversation with a narcissist.
This book will help you learn to meet your own needs while side-stepping unproductive power struggles and senseless arguments with someone who is at the center of his or her own universe. This new edition also includes new chapters on dealing with narcissistic women, aggressive and abusive narcissists, strategies for safety, and the link between narcissism and sex addiction.Finally, you'll learn how to set limits with your narcissist and when it's time to draw the line on unacceptable behavior.
Your husband crosses the line in his flirtations with another woman at a dinner party. When you confront him, he asks you to stop being insecure and controlling. After a long argument, you apologize for giving him a hard time.
Your boss backed you on a project when you met privately in his office, and you went full steam ahead. But at a large gathering of staff—including yours—he suddenly changes his tune and publicly criticizes your poor judgment. When you tell him your concerns for how this will affect your authority, he tells you that the project was ill-conceived and you’ll have to be more careful in the future. You begin to question your competence.
Your mother belittles your clothes, your job, your friends, and your boyfriend. But instead of fighting back as your friends encourage you to do, you tell them that your mother is often right and that a mature person should be able to take a little criticism.
If you think things like this can’t happen to you, think again. Gaslighting is when someone wants you to do what you know you shouldn’t and to believe the unbelieveable. It can happen to you and it probably already has.
How do we know? If you consider answering “yes” to even one of the following questions, you’ve probably been gaslighted:
Does your opinion of yourself change according to approval or disapproval from your spouse?
When your boss praises you, do you feel as if you could conquer the world?
Do you dread having small things go wrong at home—buying the wrong brand of toothpaste, not having dinner ready on time, a mistaken appointment written on the calendar?
Gaslighting is an insidious form of emotional abuse and manipulation that is difficult to recognize and even harder to break free from. That’s because it plays into one of our worst fears—of being abandoned—and many of our deepest needs: to be understood, appreciated, and loved. In this groundbreaking guide, the prominent therapist Dr. Robin Stern shows how the Gaslight Effect works and tells you how to:
Turn up your Gaslight Radar, so you know when a relationship is headed for trouble
Determine whether you are enabling a gaslighter
Recognize the Three Stages of Gaslighting: Disbelief, Defense, and Depression
Refuse to be gaslighted by using the Five Rules for Turning Off the Gas
Develop your own “Gaslight Barometer” so you can decide which relationships can be saved—and which you have to walk away from
Learn how to Gasproof Your Life so that you’ll never again choose another gaslighting relationship
Winner of the 2013 PEN/E.O. Wilson Literary Science Writing Award
Over the past two decades of neurological research, it has become increasingly clear that the way we experience the world--our perception, behavior, memory, and social judgment--is largely driven by the mind's subliminal processes and not by the conscious ones, as we have long believed. In Subliminal, Leonard Mlodinow employs his signature concise, accessible explanations of the most obscure scientific subjects to unravel the complexities of the subliminal mind. In the process he shows the many ways it influences how we misperceive our relationships with family, friends, and business associates; how we misunderstand the reasons for our investment decisions; and how we misremember important events--along the way, changing our view of ourselves and the world around us.
Do you know one of these men?
The catch-me-if-you-can lover...
Phil’s romantic and passionate one minute, distant and cold the next.
The deviously manipulative coworker or boss...
Jack denies resenting Nora’s rapid rise in the company, but when they’re assigned to work together on a project, he undermines her.
The obstructionist, procrastinating husband...
Bob keeps telling his wife he’ll finish the painting job he began years ago, but he never seems to get around to it.
These are all classic examples of the passive-aggressive man. This personality syndrome—in which hostility wears a mask of passivity—is currently the number one source of men’s problems in relationships and on the job. In Living with the Passive-Aggressive Man, Scott Wetzler draws upon numerous case histories from his own practice to explain how and why the passive-aggressive man thinks, feels, and acts the way he does. Dr. Wetzler also offers advice on:
• How to avoid playing victim, manager, or rescuer to the “P-A”
• How to get his anger and fear into the open
• How to help the “P-A” become a better lover, husband, and father
• How to survive passive-aggressive game playing on the job
Living with a man’s passive aggression can be an emotional seesaw ride. But armed with this book, you can avoid the bumpy landings.
Even if it hurts you.
All around us, every single day, human beings devoid of empathy are wreaking havoc and destroying lives in the coldest, most heartless ways imaginable. In constant pursuit of money, sex, influence, or simple entertainment, psychopaths will do whatever it takes to gain power over others. They hide behind a veil of normalcy, arranging their friends and partners like pawns in a game of chess.
Using false praise and flattery to get what they want, they can lure any unsuspecting target into a relationship. Once hooked, their charming promises spin into mind games and psychological torture. Victims are left devastated and confused, unable to recognize—or even put into words—the nightmare that just took place.
This significantly expanded edition of Psychopath Free contains new chapters, updated content, and real survivor experiences. Written from the heart, it is the first guide for survivors written by a survivor, offering hope for healing and thriving after psychopathic abuse. Say goodbye to the chaos, self-doubt, and victimization. You are free.
From the Trade Paperback edition.
We all have someone we can’t get along with—whether it’s a friend or colleague who complains constantly; a relentlessly critical boss; an obnoxious neighbor; a teenager who pouts and slams doors, all the while insisting she’s not upset; or a loving, but irritating spouse. In Feeling Good Together, Dr. David Burns presents Cognitive Interpersonal Therapy, a radical new approach that will help you transform troubled, conflicted relationships into successful, happy ones.
Dr. Burns’ method for improving these relationships is easy and surprisingly effective. In Feeling Good Together, you’ll learn how to:
- Stop pointing fingers at everyone else and start looking at yourself.
- Pinpoint the exact cause of the problem with any person you’re not getting along with.
- And solve virtually any kind of relationship conflict almost instantly.
Filled with helpful examples and brilliant, user-friendly tools such as the Relationship Satisfaction Test, the Relationship Journal, the Five Secrets of Effective Communication, the Intimacy Exercise, and more, Feeling Good Together will help you enjoy far more loving and satisfying relationships with the people you care about.
You deserve rewarding, intimate relationships. Feeling Good Together will show you how.
In a voice that is motivating and inspiring, Dr. Cloud offers practical advice on how to manage teams, coach direct reports, and instill an organization with strong values and culture.
Boundaries for Leaders: Take Charge of Your Business, Your Team, and Your Life is essential reading for executives and aspiring leaders who want to create successful companies with satisfied employees and customers, while becoming more resilient leaders themselves.
Providing clear, no-nonsense solutions for many difficult dating/relationship problems, this is an invaluable guide for any man who?s been stymied by the ?rules? of the dating game.
Intended for single or divorced men, it delivers specific, detailed advice on how and where to meet women, how to talk to them, how to ask a woman out, how to prepare for a date and keep the conversation flowing. It explains how to be a success romantically, revealing the five keys and five blocks to intimacy that can keep a relationship going or derail it completely. Readers will also learn how to know if she?s the one?and know when it?s over.
The usual advice offered in self-help books and reinforced by our culture advocates a stressful, all-consuming quest for love and approval. We are advised to learn self-marketing and manipulative skills—how to attract, impress, seduce, and often pretend to be something we aren’t. This approach doesn’t work. It leaves millions of walking wounded—those who, having failed to find love or appreciation, blame themselves and conclude that they are unworthy of love.
I Need Your Love—Is That True? helps you illuminate every area in your life where you seem to lack what you long for most—the love of your spouse, the respect of your child, a lover’s tenderness, or the esteem of your boss. Through its penetrating inquiry, you will quickly discover the falseness of the accepted ways of seeking love and approval, and also of the mythology that equates love with need. Using the method in this book, you will inquire into painful beliefs that you’ve based your whole life on—and be delighted to see them evaporate. Katie shows you how unraveling the knots in the search for love, approval, and appreciation brings real love and puts you in charge of your own happiness.
“Everyone agrees that love is wonderful, except when it’s terrible. People spend their whole lives tantalized by love—seeking it, trying to hold on to it, or trying to get over it. Not far behind love, as major preoccupations, come approval and appreciation. From childhood on, most people spend much of their energy in a relentless pursuit of these things, trying out different methods to be noticed, to please, to impress, and to win other people’s love, thinking that’s just the way life is. This effort can become so constant and unquestioned that we barely notice it anymore.
This book takes a close look at what works and what doesn’t in the quest for love and approval. It will help you find a way to be happier in love and more effective in all your relationships. What you learn here will bring fulfillment to all kinds of relationships, including romantic love, dating, marriage, work, and friendship.” —Byron Katie
From the Hardcover edition.
If any of this sounds familiar, you may be experiencing the hidden but damaging effects of a painful childhood—carrying within you a “wounded inner child” that is crying out for attention and healing.
In this powerful book, John Bradshaw shows how we can learn to nurture that inner child, in essence offering ourselves the good parenting we needed and longed for. Through a step-by-step process of exploring the unfinished business of each developmental stage, we can break away from destructive family rules and roles and free ourselves to live responsibly in the present. Then, says Bradshaw, the healed inner child becomes a source of vitality, enabling us to find new joy and energy in living.
Homecoming includes a wealth of unique case histories and interactive techniques, including questionnaires, letter-writing to the inner child, guided meditations, and affirmations. Pioneering when introduced, these classic therapies are now being validated by new discoveries in attachment research and neuroscience. No one has ever brought them to a popular audience more effectively and inspiringly than John Bradshaw.
We attempt or avoid difficult conversations every day-whether dealing with an underperforming employee, disagreeing with a spouse, or negotiating with a client. From the Harvard Negotiation Project, the organization that brought you Getting to Yes, Difficult Conversations provides a step-by-step approach to having those tough conversations with less stress and more success. you'll learn how to:
· Decipher the underlying structure of every difficult conversation
· Start a conversation without defensiveness
· Listen for the meaning of what is not said
· Stay balanced in the face of attacks and accusations
· Move from emotion to productive problem solving
From the Trade Paperback edition.
Now revised for the first time since its initial publication, this groundbreaking guide will show you how to avoid being a permissive parent, how to listen so kids will talk to you and talk so kids will listen to you, how to teach your children to "own" their problems and to solve them, and how to use the "No-Lose" method to resolve conflicts.
Using the timeless methods of P.E.T. will have immediate results: less fighting, fewer tantrums and lies, no need for punishment. Whether you have a toddler striking out for independence or a teenager who has already started rebelling, you'll find P.E.T. a compassionate, effective way to instill responsibility and create a nurturing family environment in which your child will thrive.
P.E.T., or Parent Effectiveness Training, began almost forty years ago as the first national parent-training program to teach parents how to communicate more effectively with kids and offer step-by-step advice to resolving family conflicts so everybody wins. This beloved classic is the most studied, highly praised, and proven parenting program in the world--and it will work for you.
Michael J. Lockwood knows that when it comes to relationships, women really have the control. It's the man's game not to let them know it. This empowering book is a wake-up call for women. It challenges them to be responsible for their actions, raise their standards, stop compromising, and to use their power to find a man who cherishes commitment and appreciates a fine woman.
Readers will discover:
? The red flags that signal trouble
? Why men live for the 'thrill of the hunt'
? The techniques men use to get women into bed- and away from the altar
? The ten things to never do on a date
? How women regain their rightful position of power in a relationship
Now in its third edition, Messages has helped thousands of readers cultivate better relationships with friends, family members, coworkers, and partners. You'll discover new skills to help you communicate your ideas more effectively and become a better listener. Learn how to:Read body languageDevelop skills for couples communicationNegotiate and resolve conflictsCommunicate with family membersHandle group interactionsTalk to childrenMaster public speakingPrepare for job interviewsIf you can communicate effectively, you can do just about anything. Arm yourself with the interpersonal skills needed to thrive.
New to this edition is a chapter on using acceptance skills, developed from the revolutionary new acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT). These new approaches will help you to accept your partner's feelings (and your own emotions) without judgment. Using these techniques will help you decide what you really value in your relationship and then commit to acting in ways that further those values every day.
Discovering that your husband has been unfaithful can be emotionally devastating, leaving you reeling in pain and confusion. But take heart—this survival guide for women offers compassionate and practical solutions for coping with the aftermath of an affair. Drawing on their years of experience as professional therapists, authors Marcella Bakur Weiner and Armand DiMele explain how to heal the marriage bond and restore trust between partners. Written with empathy and understanding, this book addresses such vital topics as:
·Coming to terms with the sense of loss and betrayal
·Coping with feelings of suspicion and the specter of "the other woman"
·Dealing with the children during and after the affair
·Understanding character traits of men who have affairs—and how different women's personalities interact with them
·Finding the best sources of emotional support
Also included are helpful exercises for self-healing and redeveloping mutual trust as a couple. Repairing Your Marriage After His Affair will guide you through the turmoil of infidelity and aid you in mending and strengthening your marriage vows.
From the Trade Paperback edition.
Okay, so you're shy. Here are 85 proven techniques to help you conquer your shyness and change your life for good. No psychobabble. No nonsense. These tested "ShyBusters" prepare you for that upcoming party, work function, interview, date, and the rest of your life.
As someone who overcame debilitating shyness herself, professional speaker Leil Lowndes used this method to become a confident woman who has been interviewed on hundreds of TV and radio shows and has spoken to crowds of 10,000. You'll soon be making "fearless conversation" with people who used to intimidate you. You'll learn how to win the love you deserve and ask for whatever you want. You will overcome embarrassing stammering, sweating, clamming up, and wishing you were invisible.
Good-Bye to Shy will show you how to:Make a stronger impression at work, at parties, in any situation Feel more relaxed around people, make eye contact, and spark conversations Boost your career, jump-start your social life, and open your heart to new possibilities
Say Good-Bye to Shy--and hello to the happy, loving, confident person who's been hiding inside you.
For fifteen years, Jo-Ellan Dimitrius, America's best-known jury consultant--made even more famous by her work on the O. J. Simpson trial--has predicted the behavior of thousands of jurors, witnesses, lawyers, and judges. In Reading People, she applies her amazing skills to everyday life, explaining which visual and oral clues can reliably predict behavior on the job, in relationships, and at home.
In Reading People, you'll learn
¸ how to tell a person's sincerity by the tone of his or her voice
¸ how to know if your date is interested in a serious relationship without telegraphing the answer you want
¸ how to use your intuition to determine the right preschool for your child
¸ why people who volunteer information about themselves are less credible than those who wait for you to ask questions
¸ how to stay objective when evaluating a potential boss--even if you need the job desperately
¸ how to make snap decisions that make sense
Reading People is a remarkable book that not only tells you which clues to look for but also teaches you how to be more effective in spotting them, how to keep your objectivity when evaluating them, and how to see the emerging pattern that tells you which of a person's sometimes inconsistent qualities will dictate his or her behavior.
In Reading People, you'll learn how to sharpen your intuition and avoid the pitfalls that lead to bad decisions. Even more important, you can become a better parent, friend, employee, or spouse by recognizing the subtle messages of those around you and being more responsive to them. Reading People will teach you skills that last a lifetime.
From the Hardcover edition.
This collection of practical advice tells you how to do it better.Ê
More freedom and less drama. More fun and less guilt. More connection and less loneliness. From the "Ugly Truths about Dating" to "Why Modern Dating is Better." From the "Things Men Will Always Find Attractive in Women" to "Ways to Know You're With the Wrong Guy." From "Advice for the Awkward Dater" to your new go-to questionnaire: "50 Questions to Ask Your Crush to See if They're Right for You."Ê
This is your map to the modern dating landscape, a practical guide to finding, friending, hooking up, breaking up and falling in love in the 21st century.
Feeling Loved reframes the way we view love and connection and provides a new roadmap for getting the love we need. The book begins with a description of what we unwittingly do that hijacks our ability to feel loved and goes on to offer powerful researched-based tools to transform your relationships.
A clinical psychologist of more than thirty years and cofounder of Helpguide.org, author Jeanne Segal, PhD, is a pioneer in the psychology of connection. Her engaging and practical approach guides readers in developing new ways of thinking, feeling, and acting in order to make life-altering social and emotional changes.
In Feeling Loved, you will learn how to:
- Grasp the difference between being loved and feeling loved
- Identify the challenges that keep you from experiencing love and making others feel loved
- Use proven techniques to reduce stress and regulate out-of-control emotions
- Develop new ways of thinking, feeling, and acting to create emotional connections
- Transform your relationships with everyone in your life, from family and friends to coworkers
Segal makes new inroads into the science of relationships and explores the transformative power of nonverbal, face-to-face exchanges. Filled with inspirational, real-life stories, Feeling Loved provides a blueprint for getting the love and happiness we need.
You can speak up and be heard at business meetings. You can chat with confidence in at parties. You can be the one with the best job and most interesting friends. It’s all about how you communicate and connect with others—which is something you can learn.
How to Talk to and Instantly Connect with Anyone doubles your chances of developing killer conversation skills by combining two of the best books on the subject into one eBook package. Learn how to make the right kind of connections with the right people—and enjoy better relationships, greater respect, and a richer life.
This invaluable ebook set includes:
How to Talk to Anyone and How to Instantly Connect with Anyone
Get all the secrets of successful communication. These groundbreaking guides reveal nearly 200 easy and effective techniques for becoming a master communicator, showing you how to:Make an unforgettable entrance and meet the people you want to meet Sound like an insider in any crowd, no matter how little you have in common Use body language to captivate audiences of all sizes Work a party the way a politician works a room Always come across confident, credible, and charismatic wherever you are
When you have Americans who precede anything negative with three nice comments; French, Dutch, Israelis, and Germans who get straight to the point (“your presentation was simply awful”); Latin Americans and Asians who are steeped in hierarchy; Scandinavians who think the best boss is just one of the crowd—the result can be, well, sometimes interesting, even funny, but often disastrous.
Even with English as a global language, it's easy to fall into cultural traps that endanger careers and sink deals when, say, a Brazilian manager tries to fathom how his Chinese suppliers really get things done, or an American team leader tries to get a handle on the intra-team dynamics between his Russian and Indian team members.
In The Culture Map, Erin Meyer provides a field-tested model for decoding how cultural differences impact international business. She combines a smart analytical framework with practical, actionable advice for succeeding in a global world.
Why aren't we as close as we used to be?"
PROBLEM: If you are a woman who is unfulfilled in your marriage...if you feel unheard or overburdened...if you quietly live in a state of slow-burn resentment...
PROBLEM: If you are a man unhappy that your partner seems so unhappy with you...if you feel bewildered, unappreciated, or betrayed...
This book offers a solution
Bestselling author and nationally renowned therapist Terrence Real unearths the causes of communication blocks between men and women in this groundbreaking work. Relationships are in trouble; the demand for intimacy today must be met with new skills, and Real -- drawing on his pioneering work on male depression -- gives both men and women those skills, empowering women and connecting men, radically reversing the attitudes and emotional stumbling blocks of the patriarchal culture in which we were raised. Filled with powerful stories of the couples Real treats, no other relationship book is as straight talking or compelling in its innovative approach to healing wounds and reconnecting partners with a new strength and understanding.
More than just offering a set of techniques, Bechtle offers a new perspective that will change readers' lives as they deal with those difficult people who just won't go away.
When faced with often overwhelming challenges, what woman with stepchildren is unfamiliar with that “stepmonster” feeling? Half of all women in the United States will live with or marry a man with children. To guide women new to this role—and empower those who are struggling with it—Wednesday Martin draws upon her own experience as a stepmother. She's frank about the harrowing process of becoming a stepmother, she considers the myths and realities of being married to a man with children, and she counteracts the cultural notion that stepmothers are solely responsible for the problems that often develop. Along the way, she interviews other stepmothers and stepchildren and offers up fascinating insights from literature, anthropology, psychology, and evolutionary biology that explain the little-understood realities of this unique parent-child relationship and—in an unexpected twist—shows why the myth of the Wicked Stepmother is the single best tool for understanding who real stepmothers are and how they feel.
In his book, Just Listen, Mark Goulston shared his bestselling formula for getting through to the resistant people in your life. Now, in his breakthrough new book Talking to Crazy, he brings his communication magic to the most difficult group of all—the downright irrational.
As a psychiatrist, Goulston has seen his share of crazy and he knows from experience that you can’t simply argue it away. The key to handling irrational people is to learn to lean into the crazy—to empathize with it. That radically changes the dynamic and transforms you from a threat into an ally. Talking to Crazy explains this counterintuitive Sanity Cycle and reveals:
Why people act the way they doHow instinctive responses can exacerbate the situation—and what to do insteadWhen to confront a problem and when to walk awayHow to use a range of proven techniques including Time Travel, the Fish-bowl, and the Belly RollAnd much more
You can’t reason with unreasonable people—but you can reach them. This powerful and practical book shows you how.
By giving love, instead of grabbing for it, you’ll become the person others want to love in return, no matter what their role in your life.
Relationship expert Dr. Gary Chapman applies the seven characteristics of authentic love to family life, friendship, the workplace, and beyond. Eye-opening personal assessments uncover relational strengths and weaknesses, while real-life stories and ideas for building habits of love will inspire you to grow into the complete person you were meant/created to be.
Capture a vision that will transform your relationships and make your corner of the world a better place–by choosing Love As a Way of Life.
Includes questions for personal reflection or group discussion.
From the Hardcover edition.
In 1994, Dr. John Gottman and his colleagues at the University of Washington made a startling announcement: Through scientific observation and mathematical analysis, they could predict—with more than 90 percent accuracy—whether a marriage would succeed or fail. The only thing they did not yet know was how to turn a failing marriage into a successful one, so Gottman teamed up with his clinical psychologist wife, Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman, to develop intervention methods. Now the Gottmans, together with the Love Lab research facility, have put these ideas into practice.
What emerged from the Gottmans’ collaboration and decades of research is a body of advice that’s based on two surprisingly simple truths: Happily married couples behave like good friends, and they handle their conflicts in gentle, positive ways. The authors offer an intimate look at ten couples who have learned to work through potentially destructive problems—extramarital affairs, workaholism, parenthood adjustments, serious illnesses, lack of intimacy—and examine what they’ve done to improve communication and get their marriages back on track.
Hundreds of thousands have seen their relationships improve thanks to the Gottmans’ work. Whether you want to make a strong relationship more fulfilling or rescue one that’s headed for disaster, Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage is essential reading.
From the Hardcover edition.