Black Dynamite

When ROOTS hits the air and the Community finally sees just how bad slavery was Al Sharpton whips everyone into a reparation frenzy and they storm Beverly Hills enslaving every white honky cracker they can find! But BD sees that since you can't even keep white slaves alive without caviar and arugula being slave masters is actually bringing the Community down. Is Black Dynamite actually going to fight for the White Man's freedom?

A soul-food-eating contest gets everyone in the Black Community down to the summer's biggest beach party. But the party's already jumped the shark when a giant shark jumps out and starts eating people! Captain Quinton the local old eyepatched shark-hunting mysterious mother#*?@#$% tells Black Dynamite this isn't just Jaws it's Black Jaws. All BD has to do is swim out there and kill that shark but wait what? Black Dynamite can't swim? Oh crap this might be a real problem!

It's Halloween in LA and Cream Corn convinces BD and the Crew to go to a street party where let's just say ain't nobody in the closet. Everything's gay (as in happy) and gay (as in gay) until the Emcee is assassinated in front of everyone! The unseen shooter frames BD and the Crew and now they're on a run for their lives trying to clear their name pursued by every gay gang south of West Hollywood!

A busted-up Whorephanage needs repairs and busted-up whores need a vacation so Honey Bee takes the harem to Jamaica for RandR. The hoes party to their heart's content and a disinterested Honey Bee gets her groove back when she meets the one and only Bob Marley! Back at the Whorephanage all the sex-starved johns turn into horny zombies trying to hump their way into the building but Honey Bee couldn't care less she's not coming home! Bob Marley could be her happily ever after if not for all these assassins with machine guns constantly trying to kill them!

When BD's old buddy maverick Sweet Sweetback filmmaker Melvin Van Peebles gears up to shoot his next blaxploitation movie in the Community everyone's excited to help out, except Bill Cosby! Desperate for positive black images Cos kidnaps the entire all-star cast and tries to brainwash them into besweatered upstanding representatives of the black race! While Bullhorn Cream Corn and Honey Bee fill-in for the talent and try to keep the film afloat BD must track down the pudding-pop-pusher himself and save all of black film history!

On the Orphans' collective birthday Black Dynamite brings them all to a show taping with their favorite TV white man Mister Rogers. Now you'd think that Fred Rogers was never a trained Special Forces killer and that he would definitely not kidnap all the Orphans in a deranged attempt to protect them from evil TV executives and that's exactly what doesn't not happen! With the cops outgunned and the Orphans behind guerrilla defenses it's up to Black Dynamite to invade that neighborhood and face off with Mister Rogers himself.

Cream Corn is excited as hell at getting a chance to dance on Soooooooul Train the hippest trip in America but BD knows the truth the music game is a vicious to-the-death battle between the Godfather Don Cornelius and murderous Dick Clark of American Bandstand. Cream Corn becomes a Soul Train dancer and Don's old muscle Black Dynamite sees that just when he thought he was out… they pull him back in.

Child Services is finally on to the Whorephanage and slaps them with a shutdown notice! But it's okay because rich white Mr. Phil Drummond and his rich white friends adopt all the orphans at once and whisk them off to a luxury high-rise in the sky. Just as BD comes to terms with no longer having the Orphans around he learns that luxury skyscraper is actually a deathmatch arena where the Orphans fight each other to the death for food! He's got to put an end to these Hunger Pang Games no matter how popular they are!

Black Dynamite's one day off couldn't be more work: everyone needs his help AND a riot blows up. A brick to the head sends BD hallucinating into the Magical Land of Oz-Watts a trippy technicolor world where… everyone needs his help! Between getting Scarecorn some game Lionhorn a muzzle and the Tin Bee a set of balls BD has to fight off the Wicked Bitch of the West Side and reach the Great and Powerful Mother#*?@#$%'s palace or he'll never get home.