Honey I Shrunk The Kids

For more than 30 years, Wayne has been obsessed trying to remember the lyrics to a song he once heard in the early Sixties. The song, "One, Two, Three Be Mine," was performed by the Bopkas, but no one, not even "Rolling Stone" magazine, ever heard of it. Wayne transports himself back to 1963 to catch the Bopkas' appearance on "PopTime," a short-lived music program.

In his youth, Wayne once befriended an old man who turned out to be Orson Hughes, the richest man in the world. Now, 10 years after Hughes' death, Wayne is offered a billion dollars to re-animate the eccentric rich guy's brain. What Wayne doesn't know is the brain has already been worked on by several glow- in-the-dark scientists from Chernobyl. The experiment works and Hughes' brain bubbles to life with a voice amplified by speakers. While Wayne is out cold, dizzy from his success, Hughes' henchman Lord Mongo cranks up the juice, supplying the brain with more power.

Wayne is less than enthusiastic when his sister-in-law shows up for a visit, complete with steamer trunks and addled assistant Ms. Blossom. Diane's big sister, the all-knowing Aunt Elaine, is author of several self-help works on relationships and is in Matheson for a book-signing. When Diane wishes Wayne would make an effort to understand Elaine, he takes this request to the lab. The Szalinski Brain Buffer malfunctions, but Wayne and Elaine still manage to have a meeting of the minds. Unfortunately, those two minds now reside in Wayne's head. Elaine's body is reduced to a lifeless shell, and Wayne's body is controlled by both Wayne's and Elaine's personalities.

Matheson is in the throws of the worst storm of the century, and Amy and Nick are suffering near-terminal cabin fever compounded by the fact there's nothing to watch on TV. Wayne invents the Szalinski Magnetic Microwave Pixel Induction Remote, a device that picks up all the TV waves that have been floating around in the ether since television production began. The remote, however, malfunctions when a soda is spilled in it. Wayne and the kids are accidentally pixelated, sucked into the TV vortex, and find themselves guest- starring in various sit-com and hour-long adventures.

Wayne is busy trying to perfect his Hypolyptical Organic Oxide Ray (a.k.a. the Hoo-Ray), a device based on mood-ring technology that will cause people to be happy, thus ending war and boosting global self-esteem. Wayne's new foreign assistant, Vlad Bolvahnicz, cautions that changing nature isn't necessarily a good thing. For example, because of accidental global warming, his once-frozen country is now covered with grass and butterflies, destroying their snowshoe and dog-sled economy. Wayne, however, is not convinced.

Ninjas invade Matheson and Team Szalinski is in for a lot of Kung Fu fighting to save the town. The Ninjas first arrive at a restaurant while the Szalinkis are having dinner with Jake. When they attack, Wayne fights back and the Ninjas retreat, warning that they'll be back. A monk, Master P'tui, appears to help Wayne and teaches him martial arts. Wayne has several fights with the Ninjas trying to protect his family and friends. Meanwhile, Nick, tired of being bullied into doing other people's homework, invents a spray that can turn anyone into a Kung Fu expert. Lord Bilious, an odd British fellow, wants Diane to defend him after he tried to bribe town officials and landowners to sell him the town

When arch business rival, Webb Payner, challenges W.T. to a golf match, Mr. Jennings accepts the bet, even though he doesn't know the first thing about playing golf and Payne is a champion golfer. Wayne is little help since he is even worse at the game than his boss. Despite these enormous handicaps, Jennings agrees to the bet, the winner to take over the loser's business. The fate of everyone at Jentech is riding on Wayne's ability to invent some high- tech golf clubs.

Wayne's brother, Randy Rude the Science Dude, has decided to get married -- he just hasn't found the right woman yet. On a mission to find her, Randy visits the Szalinskis to get help picking the perfect woman. Wayne offers to analyze Randy's personality and find his perfect match with the Szalinski Wifeoscepy. The Wifeoscepy picks Wayne's assistant, Margaret, as the perfect match for Randy. Randy's not happy, but Wayne decides to play cupid. When Wayne tries to set up a romantic dinner for them, Randy decides it's time to leave. He puts one of Wayne's experiments, a Super Fuel that delivers quite a kick, into the tank of Wayne's van.

Amy wants a car, but Wayne doesn't want her to drive yet. With coaxing from Diane, Wayne agrees only if he can install safety options in the car. Amy's so happy to get a car that she agrees and soon finds out the options are more than she bargained for. Wayne designed the bright yellow car with gaudy decorations to disguise all the added safety features. But the most annoying feature is Safe-T-Guy, an automated male mannequin that constantly gives her driving tips and protects her from dates. Determined not to let her father discourage her from driving, Amy endures Safe-T-Guy - - for a while.

The Matheson Community Theater is threatened with closure and must raise $5,000 with its next production or be bulldozed. Wayne reluctantly agrees to help out by directing a wretchedly-written play about Depression-era plum- pickers. The townsfolk are bitten hard by the show biz bug when Amy's publicity campaign promises Hollywood celebrities and talent scouts are planning to attend. As a result, Wayne finds himself audience to a constant stream of impromptu auditions by anyone hoping to land a part and become a star.

Randy Rude the Science Dude's ratings are slipping, so the producer decides to find a real-world science venue for the show. Jentech West is an ideal location, especially when the producer makes the proposition financially satisfactory to Mr. Jennings. Wayne is invited to stand in as Randy's assistant and proves himself a natural at stand-up science. He upstages Randy so completely that there's talk of renaming the show "Dr. Wayne Szalinski and Randy Huge the Science Stooge."

Wayne proposed to Diane during an eclipse and Team Szalinski has not missed watching a solar eclipse together ever since. It's tradition. But it's a bad day for all of the Szalinskis as they struggle to make it to the eclipse on time. Diane gets stuck in court defending a client whose dog is accused of stealing a car. Amy gets stuck in detention and Nick gets stuck on a bus with a flat tire and bad battery. Wayne finishes the "Szalinski Eclipse Illuminators," glasses that block out all ultraviolet light and have telescopic lenses, so the family can have an amazing view of the eclipse.

Amy wants to get into college and Wayne wants to help impress the recruiter who's coming to dinner at the Szalinski house. Worried Wayne will embarrass her, Amy convinces Diane to talk to Wayne about acting normal during dinner. Diane talks to Wayne while he's working on the Psycho-cybernetics Generator, a machine that makes your thoughts happen in real life. He's offended and they quarrel. Diane blurts out that she wishes they were a normal family just as she's accidentally zapped by the generator.

Wayne is supposed to go to the grand re-opening of the zoo with his family, but decides to play hooky and attend a concert, Woodslop II, with Jake and Mr. Jennings instead. Wayne tells his family he has to work and they leave without him. Before Wayne can leave the house, the refrigerator doors jam. Afraid that he'll get caught in a fib if Diane calls his office looking for him when she finds the handles are broken, Wayne tries to fix them with the Szalinski Hinge Hummer. But the refrigerator blows and covers the kitchen with food. That's just the beginning of a very bad day for the men as Mr. Jennings' attempt to help clean the kitchen starts a chain reaction of mayhem.

For a class assignment, Amy writes a news story about Wayne winning an inventor of the year award. When her story -- and his picture -- lands on the web, Wayne's trouble with the mob begins. A thief named Noodles Oregano and his gal Mitzy are hiding from the mob when they stumble across Wayne's picture. Amazed to see that Wayne looks just like Noodles, they plot to pass Wayne off as Noodles and hand him over to the mob. Mitsy plans an elaborate hoax to lure Wayne to Colorado with her to accept another award.

When Persia McQueen, a famous and elegant jewelry thief, arrives in Matheson with her two henchmen a crime spree begins. The Szalinskis stumble into the middle of the string of jewelry heists when they volunteer for community service work. Wayne invents some crime fighting tools to help the police department. When on patrol with Jake, he keeps trying to help catch the thieves with his inventions but they always get away. The rest of the Szalinski family volunteers at the Matheson Community Kitchen, a creepy looking place run by a woman who wears support hose and chews on a cigar.

Diane has a chance to become a partner at her law firm but there’s a hitch. She has to host a dinner for the firm’s ornery founding father, Colonel Coleman, and his wife before he’ll approve the promotion. No one’s ever made partner after a dinner with the Colonel. Diane is nervous enough and it doesn’t help that Wayne’s new project, The Szalinski Time Hopper, is acting up. The evening seems doomed from the moment the Colonel rings the doorbell and the Szalinskis try hard but nothing goes right.

Olaf Farfenoogsun, an insult comedian ahead of his time in the Wild West, was shot while performing his act in a saloon by some cowpokes who didn't think his insults were funny. When Mr. Von Sydow gives an antique wardrobe trunk to Diane 150 years later as thanks for some pro bono work weird things start happening in the Szalinski house. Doors close and drawers open by themselves while cables and tools take on a life of their own. The Szalinskis think they're imagining things until a dwarf clown pulls up a chair and joins them for dinner.

The Szalinskis are in for a brush with evil when ND-3 Controller, an agent with the Canadian Secret Service, appears as a hologram in Wayne’s lab closet. ND-3 wants to reactivate Wayne’s membership in the Secret Service. Wayne used to invent things for the service, but this time they want Wayne’s help on a case. Turns out one of Wayne’s former classmates, Dr. Lorenzo Zeger, now heads up the Amalgamated Association of Mad Scientists, Evil-Doers, and Mal-Contents in General.

The Szalinski’s favorite television program, the game show SMARTMOUTH, is holding auditions in Matheson and Nick wants to audition. Tired of not being taken seriously because he’s young, Nick decides to prove he’s smart enough to be a contestant. And he’s not going to let the fact that he’s too young to be allowed to compete on the show stop him. Nick makes a potion that transforms him into a very BIG adult and he takes -- and aces - the contestant test. Since no one at SMARTMOUTH is aware of his real age, Nick is invited to compete on the show.

Wayne has a get rich plan that’s about to reek havoc in the Szalinski house. Wayne decides he wants to start a moving company and make a huge profit by using the Szalinski Shrink Ray to shrink furniture and ship it for customers at a fraction of the cost. But the Shrink Ray malfunctions and starts behaving like a heat-seeking missle, tracking anyone who enters the attic lab and zapping them into miniature versions of themselves.

Wayne holes up in his lab determined to write a best selling thriller about a private eye named Wayne Wolff, a gumshoe with a good looking, wise talking secretary named Lola. A mysterious woman, Jamie Haroofenoogershtein, hires Wolff to find the man she claims kidnapped her sister -- a man who died in 1819. Even though he knows she's lying to him, he takes the case anyway. When Wolff starts looking for the truth behind Jamie's story, he runs into some shady characters looking for Jamie.