Affliction: Growing Up With a Closeted Gay Dad

Laura Hall

Jul 2021 · She Writes Press

About this ebook

In 1937, at the age of nineteen, Ralph Hall, suicidal, revealed his sexual orientation to his grandmother, knowing she would comfort him. He was out for three years afterwards, until an indiscretion sent him back into the closet. At twenty-four, while in the army, he met and married Irene. The couple made their home on the San Francisco Peninsula and had four children. Ralph was an attentive husband and father—albeit with an intense interest in interior design, flower arranging, and fine objects—and a diligent worker who rose to payroll accountant at Standard Oil. 

It wasn't until 1975 that Ralph came out to his middle daughter, Laura, telling her that he had once considered his sexuality an aberration, an affliction. She was shocked, as the possibility her father might be gay had never crossed her mind. Irene had known Ralph’s secret for eighteen years, but the two remained married until she died. It was only then that this charismatic man and devoted father, by now in his eighties, could freely express his authentic, gay self.

Here, Laura paints a vivid and honest portrait of her beloved father and the effect his secret had on her own life.  

Ratings and reviews

Even though I am not a huge fan of memoirs (I always feel like these kinds of books just drag and drag on).. I was very surprised at the end of reading how much I truly enjoyed reading this book. This is The story of Laura Hall. A girl who in her 20’s is shocked to find out that her father is gay.. and has been closeted all this time. I think it comes at a time where many people can read and relate. Either being gay themselves or possibly having gay parent, it normalizes and makes the situation easier to swallow knowing there are others out there going through a similar situation. It’s a very real, raw look at the inside of the conflicting ideals of this family’s life. This book really puts you in the middle of what it feels like to hide who you truly are in a world that may not accept you. What a wonderful way to step into someone’s else’s shoes. This beautiful story set aside I really enjoyed the authors way of writing and felt that the chapters flowed easily and without me noticing. This is huge for me as I’m always flipping to see how many more pages I have left and how much time I have until I need to stop reading. But this book just swept me into another world!

About the author

Laura Hall was born and raised in a small city on the San Francisco Peninsula. After receiving her BA (summa cum laude) and MA in landscape architecture at University of California, Berkeley, she went on to teach for the school’s Extension program and build an urban design practice. Her projects have included downtown revitalization plans for Northern California communities and pedestrian-friendly zoning codes for Mississippi Gulf towns damaged by Hurricane Katrina. She currently works at the Environmental Protection Agency in San Francisco.