Related by Chance, Family by Choice: Transforming Mother-in-Law and Daughter-in-Law Relationships
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The caricatures are everywhere, the jokes are inexhaustible, and the stereotypes fill the screens. From Marie Barone (Everyone Loves Raymond) to Viola Fields (Monster-in-Law)
to Internet sites and social media pages like ihatemyinlaws.com and a
Facebook page for ihatemymotherinlaw there is no shortage of examples of
the caustic relationships that can develop between the two women in a
man’s life.
Deb DeArmond and her three daughters-in-law have
conducted their own exhaustive research into the status of the
women-in-law relationship. Their research, which incorporated online
surveys, interviews, and discussions, included asking about the faith
factor in the relationships they studied. Of the respondents, nearly 90
percent claimed they were Christians, and 79 percent said their faith
was foundational and guided their actions and decisions. As discouraging
as it may be, the numbers of those they surveyed who reported that
their women-in-law relationships were “bad” were nearly identical to
those in a survey conducted by a popular secular website that recorded
no statistics on faith.
Beyond the statistics and their analysis,
Deb brings to this book more than thirty years working with adults to
improve communications and deal constructively with conflict. Aside from
her research and her professional expertise, perhaps the most important
asset Deb brings to this work is her own relationship with her three
daughters-in-law that is so obviously and unusually positive that
she—and they—are often asked to explain the secret of the relationships
they share.
This practical and unapologetically scriptural book
covers issues of personal perceptions, strained communication, the roles
of sons and fathers in the relationship’s success, how to begin these
relationships on the right foot, and the necessity of trust and love.
Deb’s one motivating objective is to help womenin- law move from women
who are simply related to strong and confident members of a truly
spiritual family.
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Deb DeArmond has owned her own leadership training
and executive coaching practice for fifteen years. She is an expereinced
speaker and writer with work appearing in WHOA Magazine and Dallas Family Magazine
and a cofounder of mypurposenow.org—an online community for Christian
women 50+. Deb and her husband, Ron, have three married sons and three
grandchildren, and live in the Dallas/Fort Worth area. Find out more at
debdearmond.com.
