About this ebook
Taylor Armstrong, star of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills on Bravo, pulls back the curtain on the years she suffered in silence through domestic violence in this searingly honest account of her troubled marriage to the late Russell Armstrong.
The terrible truth is that I felt lost without the control that Russell had imposed on me for the nearly six years that we were married. Disturbingly, I missed that control. I didn’t know what to do once I had no one there to tell me how to dress, act, and behave; what to want; and who, even, to be. In some ways, I missed the abuse. I missed the pain. I missed being scared. Not because I liked feeling any of that. But because it was the life I had become accustomed to, and without anyone to be afraid of, to apologize to, and to cover for, I felt completely lost.
Reality hit Taylor Armstrong hard one tragic evening last August when she found the body of her estranged husband, Russell, hanging in his California home. Fans across the country were shocked at the horrific news of his death and even more shocked to discover that behind the glittering “reality” of Taylor’s life on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills lurked a painful story of emotional and physical abuse that she had been terrified to tell.
To the outside world, the Armstrongs lived like royalty, throwing lavish parties—including a memorable tea party for their daughter’s fourth birthday—and mingling with their privileged Housewives co-stars. It was impossible to hide the cracks in their marriage from the cameras forever, though, and their darkest secrets slowly began to seep through the gilded façade.
With searing honesty, Taylor candidly examines her difficult journey from the abusive home in which she was born to the low self-esteem that kept her constantly on the run from herself, to the tumultuous marriage that ended in suicide, and ultimately to her realization that only by sharing her moving story could she help other women.
The terrible truth is that I felt lost without the control that Russell had imposed on me for the nearly six years that we were married. Disturbingly, I missed that control. I didn’t know what to do once I had no one there to tell me how to dress, act, and behave; what to want; and who, even, to be. In some ways, I missed the abuse. I missed the pain. I missed being scared. Not because I liked feeling any of that. But because it was the life I had become accustomed to, and without anyone to be afraid of, to apologize to, and to cover for, I felt completely lost.
Reality hit Taylor Armstrong hard one tragic evening last August when she found the body of her estranged husband, Russell, hanging in his California home. Fans across the country were shocked at the horrific news of his death and even more shocked to discover that behind the glittering “reality” of Taylor’s life on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills lurked a painful story of emotional and physical abuse that she had been terrified to tell.
To the outside world, the Armstrongs lived like royalty, throwing lavish parties—including a memorable tea party for their daughter’s fourth birthday—and mingling with their privileged Housewives co-stars. It was impossible to hide the cracks in their marriage from the cameras forever, though, and their darkest secrets slowly began to seep through the gilded façade.
With searing honesty, Taylor candidly examines her difficult journey from the abusive home in which she was born to the low self-esteem that kept her constantly on the run from herself, to the tumultuous marriage that ended in suicide, and ultimately to her realization that only by sharing her moving story could she help other women.
Ratings and reviews
4.3
63 reviews
A Google user
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February 12, 2012
Well written. Taylor I wish you and little Kennedy all the best. It is sad that these things go on and after having read your book and learning many of the warning signs you bet I will be paying more attention and making sure to support and offer help to any that I come in contact with that need help. God bless you for writing this book. I love the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and want to see you and the other girls (maybe not Brandi) for seasons to come. Prayers and hugs to you..
A Google user
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December 3, 2015
Thought some of the RHOBH ladies did not show enough support b4 her hubby's death& others treated Taylor very poorly after his death. I was appalled at Yolanda Foster's cruel, unsympathetic, extremely self-centered behavior & reaction to Taylor, knowing her husband hung himself! But then Yolanda has 1 bad thing after another happen in her life to teach her a lesson, yet she never learns. Karma never fails.When the proud fall, they fall hard. The arrogant always get their commuppance. Happy for Taylor now!!
3 people found this review helpful
CINDY MITCHELL
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May 28, 2019
Overall this story was an eye opening experience. I am rewatching the first seasons on RHOBH. I was never a huge fan of Taylor but I get her more know. I feel terrible. Knowing what was happening in her life at the time is a good story to share. I don't feel like she is as strong as she portrays and I also don't feel like she would of gotten out of the relationship if he didn't kill himself. This makes me sad reading the insecurities throughout this book. I would love to know where she is mentally today.
2 people found this review helpful
About the author
Taylor Armstrong was a star of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills on Bravo. She currently lives with her daughter in California.
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