Agnes and the Hitman: A Novel

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Take one food writer named Cranky Agnes, add a hitman named Shane, mix them together with a Southern mob wedding, a missing necklace, two annoyed flamingos, and a dog named Rhett and you've got a recipe for a sexy, hilarious novel about the disastrous side of true love...
Agnes Crandall's life goes awry when a dognapper invades her kitchen one night, seriously hampering her attempts to put on a wedding that she's staked her entire net worth on. Then a hero climbs through her bedroom window. His name is Shane, no last name, just Shane, and he has his own problems: he's got a big hit scheduled, a rival trying to take him out, and an ex-mobster uncle asking him to protect some little kid named Agnes. When he finds out that Agnes isn't so little, his uncle has forgotten to mention a missing five million bucks he might have lost in Agnes's house, and his last hit was a miss, Shane's life isn't looking so good, either. Then a bunch of lowlifes come looking for the money, a string of hit men show up for Agnes, and some wedding guests gather with intent to throw more than rice. Agnes and Shane have their hands full with greed, florists, treachery, flamingos, mayhem, mothers of the bride, and—most dangerous of all—each other. Agnes and the Hitman is the perfect combination of sugar and spice, sweet and salty—a novel of delicious proportions.
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About the author

JENNIFER CRUSIE is the New York Times, Publishers Weekly, and USA Today bestselling author of Tell Me Lies, Crazy for You, Welcome to Temptation, Faking It, Fast Women, and Bet Me.

BOB MAYER is a former Green Beret and the USA Today bestselling author of thirty-two novels under his own name and the pen names Robert Doherty and Greg Donegan. He has over two million books in print.
Together, they wrote the New York Times bestselling Don't Look Down.

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Additional Information

Publisher
St. Martin's Press
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Published on
Aug 26, 2008
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Pages
384
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ISBN
9781429917988
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Features
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Language
English
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Genres
Fiction / Romance / Romantic Comedy
Fiction / Romance / Suspense
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Content Protection
This content is DRM protected.
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Read Aloud
Available on Android devices
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Eligible for Family Library

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Jennifer Crusie
Meet the Goodnights, a respectable family who have run a respectable art gallery for generations. There's Gwen, the matriarch who sedates herself with double-crostics and double vodkas, Eve the oldest daughter who has a slight identity problem (she has two), and Nadine, the granddaughter who's ready to follow in the family footsteps as soon as she can find a set that isn't leading off a cliff. Holding everyone together is Matilda, the youngest daughter, who's inherited the secret locked down in the basement of the Goodnight Gallery, the secret that she's willing to do almost anything to keep, including break into a house in the dead of night to steal back her past.

Meet the Dempseys, or at least meet Davy, a reformed con man who's just
been ripped off for a cool three million by his financial manager, who then gallantly turned it over to Clea Lewis, the most beautiful sociopath Davy ever slept with. Davy wants the money back, but more than that he'll do anything to keep Clea from winning, including break into her house in the dead of night to steal back his future.

One collision in a closet later, Tilda and Davy reluctantly join forces to combat Clea, suspicious art collectors, a disgruntled heir, and an exasperated hitman, all the while coping with a mutant dachshund, a juke box stuck in the sixties, questionable sex, a painting of three evil fisherman closing in on a dyspeptic tuna, multiple personalities, miscellaneous Goodnights and Dempseys, and the growing realization that they can't turn their backs on the people they were meant to be...or the people they were born to love.

Faking It: What has reality ever done for you?

Jennifer Crusie
Εκείνη ξέρει πως χάπι εντ έχουν μόνο οι ταινίες. Πώς να ελπίζει σε μια ευτυχή κατάληξη άλλωστε: ο άντρας που ζήτησε να τη βγάλει για φαγητό το έκανε μόνο και μόνο για να κερδίσει ένα στοίχημα. Βέβαια οφείλει να παραδεχτεί πως ο Κάλβιν Μόρισεϊ είναι κούκλος.

Εκείνος ξέρει πως δεν πρόκειται να δεσμευτεί, ειδικά με μια γυναίκα τόσο γκρινιάρα όσο η Μιν Ντομπς, παρά τα σέξι παπούτσια της και την εξυπνάδα της.

Στο τέλος της βραδιάς που περνούν μαζί είναι σίγουροι πως δεν πρόκειται να ξανασυναντηθούν.

Η μοίρα όμως έχει άλλα σχέδια για εκείνους και έτσι πολύ γρήγορα η Μιν κι ο Καλ έχουν να αντιμετωπίσουν: παρεμβατικούς φίλους, έναν ζηλιάρη πρώην, μια αποφασισμένη ψυχολόγο, μια έξαλλη νύφη και περισσότερες ριψοκίνδυνες προκλήσεις απ’ όσες θα μπορούσαν ποτέ να σκεφτούν, μαζί με το μεγαλύτερο στοίχημα όλων – την άνευ όρων αγάπη.
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