BEFORE INC.WE935.I57.N211: A company that will end your future!
About this ebook
A story that will make you rethink your free will but still choose to live inside your flesh and bones carcass.
World’s End 935, Iteration 57, Narrative 211.
Random fragments from the book:
"He is the worst kind of being ever to live.” Says Articus.
“Is he that evil?” Asks Tamaraa.
“No, he’s a Bureaucrat.” Swiftly responds Articus
“.. / .- --. .-. . .” Says -... --- -..., the morse-talking vase.
For a sentient ape with a sense of style, she was gorgeous.
The head of this department is, well, believe me or not, a morse-speaking vase... He calls himself -... --- -...
Well, when our parasitic friend here hit Earth, it attached to that tree, uprooted himself, and now we have a Parasitic Chair as Head of the Botanists Department.
“… you heard it from here first, folk! The government is creating a giant microwave oven to reheat our beloved Sun!... now let’s go to the weather today…”
“Where are you? Near County Rd.7586? Sorry not our jurisdiction.” or “Hey aren’t you that wanted criminal, stay just right there?!” or “Hey sexy are you alone? Play this game right now for free!” This was all that was in his head right now.
She was doomed and ready to accept that this was her life now. The one newbie who peed herself on the first day, and everyone will know her as the “pee lady” or “Ms. Pee.”
“The eyetooth device is ready to pair…”
She puts her head in the sink and the water flows. It goes on her face, up into her ears and nose, but she kept drinking like a dog on a hot summer day.
She then takes dozens of pictures, almost all from the same angle. Each almost looking the same, but that wasn’t the case. In her mind, every single one of them was different.
The room has disappeared, and in the middle of everyone in the department, Tamaraa was sitting on a leg like a flamingo, putting up her last sock. At least the room left her shoes with her.
It was emanating a godly aura. Rainbows appeared in the room, starting and ending at the coffee machine. Who needs gold when you have coffee in a long, depressing morning at work?
“Pink doesn’t suit you, bitc.…”
Who would have thought that in a multiverse of possibilities, in every single iteration, there are douchebags and nerds? Except for one. But we don’t talk badly about gremlins.
In all my career, not even once have I been treated this bad on an acting gig. Who in their fucking minds would attack the victim?
“I am stupid!” Proudly exclaimed him.
“Put them under her nose. And let’s get over this fast. I don’t have all day.” Says John, bored.
“Plum juice and eucalyptus. Half of each, it tastes like a horse's arse. Not that I would know how that taste like. It’s a medicine down here for cold. The plum juice and eucalyptus, not the horse's arse. Not that horse's arse would be bad. We have horse people here too, but…”
Those guys invented AIDS and cancer? Why in hell would they do that?
“No, not like a zoo. It’s more an animal farm.”
“The entire floor is the one in charge of the floor? What?” Responds Tamaraa, slightly mad.
“Great Bubba, you got us a crackhead to look after. Damn, people those days and their techno parties.” Mumbles John as he takes out a pack of cigarettes, lighting one with a stove near the parking lot.
… the reptilians did the global warming to heat their cold blood. I saw the little buggers sitting on rocks in the summer.
“Let the crack, miss, let the crack. It ain’t good for the garden in ya head.” Says as he closes the back door.
As many of you would know, that’s the recipe for B52, but for an interdimensional being, that means lunch.
“They’re loud again.” Says Agatha, looking at a dinosaur arm wrestling a chair while a vase was being the referee.
