The Alpha Female's Guide to Men and Marriage: How Love Works

Post Hill Press
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The Alpha Female's Guide to Men and Marriage shows women who have a dominating personality how to love a man.

America is in love with the alpha female. She’s the quintessential modern woman—assertive, razor sharp, and fully in control. Her success in the marketplace is undeniable, a downright boon to society. But what happens when the alpha female gets married?

She becomes an alpha wife, of course.

An alpha wife is in charge of everything and everyone. She is, quite simply, the Boss. The problem is, no man wants a boss for a wife. That type of relationship may work for a spell, but it will eventually come crashing down. Since 1970, just as women became more and more powerful outside the home—more alpha—the divorce rate has quadrupled. And it is women who lead the charge. Today, 70% of divorce is initiated by wives.

Do men just make lousy husbands? Not at that rate, says Suzanne Venker, bestselling author of The War on Men. The truth is that women don’t know how to be wives. Why would they? That’s not what they were raised to become.

But women can learn. There’s an art to loving a man, says Venker, and any woman can master it. An alpha female herself, Venker learned how to be a wife the hard way—through trial and error. Lots of error. And here’s what she knows today—the set of skills a woman needs to pursue a career, or even to raise children, is the exact set of skills that will mess up her marriage but good. No man likes to be told what to do. And no woman respects the man who does.

The Alpha Female's Guide to Men and Marriage gives women who are used to being in charge the tools they need to make their marriages less competitive and more complementary. Part memoir, part advice, this brave manifesto argues that while marriage is more challenging for the alpha female, it is possible to find peace in your marriage. In fact, it may be easier than you think. 

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About the author

SUZANNE VENKER is an author, speaker, and nationally recognized expert on America’s current gender war. She’s a Fox news contributor and a columnist at PJ Media.

Suzanne’s bestselling e-book, The War on Men, was fashioned from her article of the same name that became the #1 op-ed in Fox News history. The result was a barrage of media backlash and an appearance on The View, where Suzanne enjoyed friendly banter with guest host Mike Tyson while fielding attacks from Whoopi and Joy.

Suzanne’s most recent book, The Alpha Female’s Guide to Men and Marriage: HOW LOVE WORKS (February 2017), helps women with domineering personalities learn how to love a man. Her other books include The Two-Income TrapHow to Choose a Husband, and The Flipside of Feminism.

Suzanne has written for many publications including TimeParentsNew York Post, and the St. Louis Post-Dispatch. She has also been featured in The Wall Street Journal as well as Newsweek, The AtlanticThe EconomistThe Huffington Post, and London’s Daily Mail.

Suzanne’s TV credits include The View, Fox & Friends, ABC News, CNN, C-Span’s Book TV, and more. She has appeared on hundreds of radio shows throughout the country, and her work has been featured on The Dr. Laura ProgramThe Late Show with Stephen Colbert, and The Rush Limbaugh Show.

Suzanne graduated from Boston University in 1986. Today she lives in St. Louis, Missouri, with her husband of 18 years and their two teenagers. 

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Additional Information

Publisher
Post Hill Press
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Published on
Feb 14, 2017
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Pages
176
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ISBN
9781618688453
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Language
English
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Genres
Family & Relationships / Love & Romance
Family & Relationships / Marriage & Long Term Relationships
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Content Protection
This content is DRM protected.
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Available on Android devices
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For decades feminists have belabored the idea that work should be at the center of women’s lives, and that motherhood wouldn’t get in the way of this goal if society would simply cooperate. If husbands performed half the housework and childcare, if the government would invest in universal daycare and family leave, and if employers allowed parents to leave the office at 5:00 p.m., women could achieve the balance they so desperately seek. But the real reasons work-family balance remains elusive are much more complex.

In The Two-Income Trap, bestselling author and Fox News contributor Suzanne Venker claims the two-income family is a trap. It encourages Americans to think about family solely in terms of economics, when in fact breadwinning is only part of the equation. The burnout that results from not having someone home to do everything mothers have historically done is huge.

Not only do children lose out, marriages become stressed to the breaking point. Husbands and wives become locked in a battle over who’s going to do what on the home front. When that happens, many women view this as a marital problem when in fact the issue is time. There just isn’t enough. “The battles [between husbands and wives] aren’t always waged over actual chores or the inequity of handling them. The battle is over time,” writes Rhonda Nordin in After the Baby.

At the core of this debate, writes Venker, is the fact that raising a family is no longer valued or even recognized as an enormous undertaking. The needs of children simply don’t allow both parents the freedom to dedicate themselves fully to something else.

Fortunately, Americans are finally accepting this fact. Not only are more fathers staying home, the share of stay-at-home mothers rose to 29% in 2012, up from a modern-era low of 23% in 1999. This rise represents a reversal of the long-term decline in this group that had persisted for the last three decades of the 20th century—during which time feminists waved the flag of liberation.

But none of it feels liberating. Women are tired of trying to keep up with the demands of full-time work and childrearing. They’re tired of trying to prove themselves. The idea that women can ‘have it all’—pursue demanding careers, raise fabulous kids and remain perfectly sane along the way—is bogus. There are only so many hours in a day.

The secret to balance, for those who want it, is to accept that a woman’s life has seasons: a time for this and a time for that. Women who insist on doing everything at once are proving nothing except an allegiance to a dying movement. The era of  “I am woman, hear me roar” is over. 

Women can have most of what they want over the course of their lives, but not if they follow the cultural script feminists have laid out for them. Women need to adjust their expectations and accept that when we choose to have children, we choose a life of trade-offs. So do men.

We also need to broaden our view of what it means to be successful. Being important in the outside world is great, but it will never compare to the significance of our presence at home, and to the calming nature of that home when someone’s physically there. At the end of the day, it’s our personal success, not our professional success, that determines how happy we are.

“Dr. Laura” praises The Two-Income Trap:  “Ms. Venker’s contribution to humanity, to families, to marriages, to women is huge. In a way, it is sad that she’s got to argue points to prove what ought to be a “given.” On the other hand, her arguments are beautifully crafted and right on target for today’s anti-childrearing atmosphere. My hope for you, the reader, is that after you read this book, you will be unwavering in your commitment to do the right thing, and reap the incredible rewards.”

He’s Just Not That Into You—based on a popular episode of Sex and the City—is tough love advice for otherwise smart women on how to tell when a guy just doesn’t like them enough, so they can stop wasting time making excuses for a dead-end relationship. It’s the best relationship advice you’ll ever receive.

For ages, women have come together over coffee, cocktails, or late-night phone chats to analyze the puzzling behavior of men.

He’s afraid to get hurt again.
Maybe he doesn’t want to ruin the friendship.
Maybe he’s intimidated by me.
He just got out of a relationship.

Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo are here to say that—despite good intentions—you’re wasting your time. Men are not complicated, although they’d like you to think they are. And there are no mixed messages.

The truth may be, He’s just not that into you.

Unfortunately, guys are too terrified to ever directly tell a woman, “You're not the one.” But their actions absolutely show how they feel.

Reexamining familiar scenarios and classic mindsets that keep us in unsatisfying relationships, Behrendt and Tuccillo’s wise and wry understanding of the sexes spares women hours of waiting by the phone, obsessing over the details with sympathetic girlfriends, and hoping his mixed messages really mean, “I’m in love with you and want to be with you.”

He’s Just Not That Into You is provocative, hilarious, and, above all, intoxicatingly liberating. It deserves a place on every woman’s night table. It knows you’re a beautiful, smart, funny woman who deserves better. The next time you feel the need to start “figuring him out,” consider the glorious thought that maybe, He’s just not that into you. And then set yourself loose to go find the one who is.
Some things about babies, happily, will never change. They still arrive warm, cuddly, soft, and smelling impossibly sweet. But how moms and dads care for their brand-new bundles of baby joy has changed—and now, so has the new-baby bible.

Announcing the completely revised third edition of What to Expect the First Year. With over 10.5 million copies in print, First Year is the world’s best-selling, best-loved guide to the instructions that babies don’t come with, but should. And now, it’s better than ever. Every parent’s must-have/go-to is completely updated.

Keeping the trademark month-by-month format that allows parents to take the potentially overwhelming first year one step at a time, First Year is easier-to-read, faster-to-flip-through, and new-family-friendlier than ever—packed with even more practical tips, realistic advice, and relatable, accessible information than before. Illustrations are new, too.

Among the changes: Baby care fundamentals—crib and sleep safety, feeding, vitamin supplements—are revised to reflect the most recent guidelines. Breastfeeding gets more coverage, too, from getting started to keeping it going. Hot-button topics and trends are tackled: attachment parenting, sleep training, early potty learning (elimination communication), baby-led weaning, and green parenting (from cloth diapers to non-toxic furniture). An all-new chapter on buying for baby helps parents navigate through today’s dizzying gamut of baby products, nursery items, and gear. Also new: tips on preparing homemade baby food, the latest recommendations on starting solids, research on the impact of screen time (TVs, tablets, apps, computers), and “For Parents” boxes that focus on mom’s and dad’s needs. Throughout, topics are organized more intuitively than ever, for the best user experience possible.

For decades feminists have belabored the idea that work should be at the center of women’s lives, and that motherhood wouldn’t get in the way of this goal if society would simply cooperate. If husbands performed half the housework and childcare, if the government would invest in universal daycare and family leave, and if employers allowed parents to leave the office at 5:00 p.m., women could achieve the balance they so desperately seek. But the real reasons work-family balance remains elusive are much more complex.

In The Two-Income Trap, bestselling author and Fox News contributor Suzanne Venker claims the two-income family is a trap. It encourages Americans to think about family solely in terms of economics, when in fact breadwinning is only part of the equation. The burnout that results from not having someone home to do everything mothers have historically done is huge.

Not only do children lose out, marriages become stressed to the breaking point. Husbands and wives become locked in a battle over who’s going to do what on the home front. When that happens, many women view this as a marital problem when in fact the issue is time. There just isn’t enough. “The battles [between husbands and wives] aren’t always waged over actual chores or the inequity of handling them. The battle is over time,” writes Rhonda Nordin in After the Baby.

At the core of this debate, writes Venker, is the fact that raising a family is no longer valued or even recognized as an enormous undertaking. The needs of children simply don’t allow both parents the freedom to dedicate themselves fully to something else.

Fortunately, Americans are finally accepting this fact. Not only are more fathers staying home, the share of stay-at-home mothers rose to 29% in 2012, up from a modern-era low of 23% in 1999. This rise represents a reversal of the long-term decline in this group that had persisted for the last three decades of the 20th century—during which time feminists waved the flag of liberation.

But none of it feels liberating. Women are tired of trying to keep up with the demands of full-time work and childrearing. They’re tired of trying to prove themselves. The idea that women can ‘have it all’—pursue demanding careers, raise fabulous kids and remain perfectly sane along the way—is bogus. There are only so many hours in a day.

The secret to balance, for those who want it, is to accept that a woman’s life has seasons: a time for this and a time for that. Women who insist on doing everything at once are proving nothing except an allegiance to a dying movement. The era of  “I am woman, hear me roar” is over. 

Women can have most of what they want over the course of their lives, but not if they follow the cultural script feminists have laid out for them. Women need to adjust their expectations and accept that when we choose to have children, we choose a life of trade-offs. So do men.

We also need to broaden our view of what it means to be successful. Being important in the outside world is great, but it will never compare to the significance of our presence at home, and to the calming nature of that home when someone’s physically there. At the end of the day, it’s our personal success, not our professional success, that determines how happy we are.

“Dr. Laura” praises The Two-Income Trap:  “Ms. Venker’s contribution to humanity, to families, to marriages, to women is huge. In a way, it is sad that she’s got to argue points to prove what ought to be a “given.” On the other hand, her arguments are beautifully crafted and right on target for today’s anti-childrearing atmosphere. My hope for you, the reader, is that after you read this book, you will be unwavering in your commitment to do the right thing, and reap the incredible rewards.”

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