The Best Moms Don't Do it All: How Moms Got Stuck Doing Everything for Their Families and What They Can Do About It

Thomas Phelan PhD

Ago 2022 · Sourcebooks, Inc.

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The only book that gives you an actionable plan to reduce the emotional labor and mental load that comes with raising a busy family while trying to live your own life—from a clinical psychologist and bestselling author

Are you a mom who does it all? This is the book for you.

It's impossible to deny—most moms continue to do way more household work and childcare than most dads. Working full time, raising kids, cooking dinner, making sure every appointment and activity is lined up and that everyone gets there on time... no wonder you're tired! But despite all the books and articles lamenting the crushing mental load and emotional labor women bear for their families, no one has come up with a plan to actually make things change. Until now.

The Best Moms Don't Do it All is the first book that not only acknowledges the fact that moms are burning out, but shows you how to transfer responsibility for daily tasks from yourself to your partner and also (gasp!) your kids. Clinical psychologist and child discipline expert Thomas W. Phelan, PhD explains how we got into this mess in the first place, and how we can get out of it through a calm, systematic approach to teaching our families how to take initiative and contribute in meaningful ways. Dr. Phelan walks you through real-life situations and shows you how to step back from the things that are dragging you down. For example:

Your Maternal Identity—the things you tell yourself you have to do in order to be a "good" mom
The oppressive trap of chronic supervision
Our society's curious underestimation of children's capabilities
How to eliminate primary childcare with tweens and teens
How to manage resistant or traditionalist dads

Realistic and simple enough to implement in your home right away, The Best Moms Don't Do it All provides a roadmap for you to take your life back and proves that the happiest families share the work and the fun equally.

*Previously published as The Manager Mom Epidemic*

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Dr. Thomas W. Phelan is an internationally renowned expert, author, and lecturer on child discipline and Attention Deficit Disorder. A registered Ph.D. clinical psychologist, he appears frequently on radio and TV. Dr. Phelan practices and works in the western suburbs of Chicago.

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